Tag: Stephen

The Good, the bad and Reality Check

On By dancingpalmtreesIn The Good, the bad and Reality Check, Uncategorized, V.A. Hospital, Veteran's Adminstration12 Comments

 

The Good, the bad and Reality Check

Yesterday I received my Marymount Manhattan College 2017 Reunion Weekend reminder invitation for the Class of 2002! 🙂 Can’t believe 15 years have passed so quickly since my graduation!! Wow!! Time is really moving at a fast pace!!

The Following is an email form my brother Stephen. This really made my day and brought me tears of Joy as I’ve had a particularly horrendous work week. No sooner than I get back to work from my Lovely vacation than a co-worker who has it in for me is filing accusations against me and 3 other co-workers charging us with harassment and physically pushing her. Of course it’s not true but my workplace which is already horrible is about to get 1000 times worse.  Job = Hell + Dante’s Inferno.  But again there is nothing I can do.  Because this person’s life is all screwed up she is doing her best to make the rest of us miserable.

Stephen’s words gave me the pick me up and happiness I need to go on in Life. At least I know Stephen Loves me if nobody else does. My brother Stephen is such an Amazing Autism Guy!!

Stephen’s Awesome Email Message!!!

“Hi sister how are you doing today . I had a good day at program today , I draw and colored with my peers, I also helped with the paper work in the class room . After i went to lunch, it was good i really enjoyed lunch time with my friends. I wanted to know if you still have the drawing of the picture i made.”

Sent my reply to Stephen right away and perhaps when he returns to program I will receive an answer sometime next week.  I have no idea what picture Stephen is talking about but I asked him to make several more pictures for me and I will add them to our ongoing photo/picture collage project.

Real Life Reality Check

As for the Stephen’s clothing situation which I discussed in previous emails I spoke with the Director of his Group Home Residence while I was on vacation. He said he would email me an inventory of all Stephen’s belongings.  Well a week has passed since I returned to work from my vacation and no inventory.  Since I don’t drive and can’t afford a cab or taxi to get over there I suppose I will never find out what exactly is going on.

I did contact other agencies that are supposed to oversee and/or monitor group homes but they told me that there was nothing they could do and had no wish to become involved in our case.  I’m not supposed to make or take personal calls on my job plus I think my phone is about to be cut-off because I don’t have money to pay the bill.

Before T-Mobile disconnects me I must get in touch with the Veteran’s Administration. The V.A. did call me back this past week but by the time I get home they are closed. I also received some type of VA health care card in the mail so I guess that’s a form of progress. Next goal is to set up an appointment with the local V.A. health care facility to see if they can help me with my medical problems.

I suppose this is one of those Life’s Lessons where one has to admit defeat. I finally had to admit to myself I can no longer fulfill many of my responsibilities. It’s physically impossible for me to hold down a full-time job which requires me to work very long hours, keep up with what’s going on in Stephen’s Residence plus attempt to take care of myself.

I’m not a machine with replaceable parts or a robot who can just plow through obstacles. I’m a human being whose body has begun to betray me.  The aging process is no joke!

In the back of my mind I knew I was failing but did not want to admit it. As humans we Love to Lie to Ourselves that we are powerful, strong, capable and ready to take on any challenge. Well that’s not always the case. When I was younger, with a flexible well paying job and in better health yeah I could do whatever I set my mind to.  Recently over these past few months reality slapped me upside my head and reminded me of all my numerous failures.  However I know in my heart, soul and mind I did the best I could but sometimes one’s best is not good enough.

Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose. Lots of times Life Sucks. This is one of those times.

 

 

Stylin’ Sibs and Family!!

On By dancingpalmtreesIn DeBorah, DeBorah Ann Palmer, Edward G. Palmer, Edward Gordon Palmer, Edward Palmer, Helen Garcia, Helen Palmer Garcia, Mable Elizabeth Palmer, Mable Palmer, Stephen, Stephen Vincent Palmer, Stylish | The Daily Post, Thelma Palmer Varner, Uncategorized8 Comments

 

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/stylish/#like-249669

DAILY PROMPT

Stylish

Stephen and I have been Stylin’ since we were babies.  I grew up as a Girly Girl. A real Clotheshorse especially when I was younger. I had more shoes in my closet than Imelda Marcos and after I moved into my own apartment the clothes bar in my closet broke under the weight of all my outfits!  LOL!! My Dad used to joke that I had to get dressed just to put out the garbage. I think that I took after my Aunt Thelma who had those same attributes and passed them along to me!!  LOL!!

I was never much on make-up (except lip stick otherwise I look like a blank slate), fake eyelashes or fake nails but since my job requires me to be on my feet for long hours bi-monthly pedicures are a must. I do get manicures but neat, short, clean with clear polish because I still must cook, clean the house and do dishes.  Of course hair care is a must!! As you can see from my photos I’ve had every hair style know to Black People from the 60s up to and including the present. Now I color my hair. I loathe gray hair. I do not look good in gray hair and let’s not advance my age more than it is already. Getting older should not include looking like a frump or a bag lady.  Yes, Vanity Thy Name is Woman!! LOL!!

My Mom Mable Elizabeth Palmer who was born in the small town of Davy, WV and raised in Dayton, Ohio also Loved to dress well. Her beauty and style are what captured the heart of my Dad Edward G. Palmer.

My Mom Mable Elizabeth Palmer.

Mable Elizabeth Palmer ~~ My Mom

My Paternal Aunts Thelma Palmer Varner and Helen Palmer Garcia.

Aunt Thelma, yours truly, Aunt Helen HS Graduation 1977

 

Stylin’ Sibs plus Dad!!

 

Me and Dad
2002 MMC Grad
Me and an Army Friend
Me and the Borg at my old office job where I made more money and had a better life.
Church Lady Blue
Regal Blue Church Lady
#NoMakeup
Natural Beauty
DeBorah & Stephen 1961
Defiant precocious DeBorah
1961- A Very Good Year
MMC 2002 Graduation
Natural Beauty
Fifty-Sexy
Fifty-Sexy
Fifty Sultry Sexy
#NoMakeup
Me and My Birthday Cake
My Birthday Celebration
School Days
Little Me

 

 

 

The Black Twiggy Plus Funny Story

On By dancingpalmtreesIn Edward G. Palmer, Edward Gordon Palmer, Edward Palmer, Helen Garcia, Helen Palmer Garcia, Montreal, Canada 1970, Photographs, Photography, Stephen, Stephen Vincent Palmer, Twiggy Biography, Uncategorized4 Comments

 

 

When I was a child the other school kids used to make fun of me calling me the “Black Twiggy.”  As you can see from my childhood and young adult photos I was as thin as a rail. It was not until my 40s that I began to gain some much needed weight. Recently since my brother Stephen needed a food supplement I started back drinking Ensure. Tastes good and helps us not only maintain but to gain weight. Like Twiggy I too wanted to be a model but unlike her my dream of being a model did not come true except for mugging for the camera on this blog!!

Some of my photos Past & Present

Me and an Army Friend
Me and the Borg at my old office job where I made more money and had a better life.
2002 MMC Grad
2002 MMC Graduate
Me and Dad
School Days
Montreal 1970

 

Funny 1970 Montreal, Canada Family Vacation Story

Funny story regarding the 1970 Summer Montreal Trip with my Dad, Aunt Helen and brother Stephen. We went visit a home designed for dwarfs. Now in those days they were called midgets but the correct term in dwarf. The Lady Dwarf in the photo was born to Dwarf Parents. Her parents had constructed a house where everything was scaled down to their size. For me I was about 11 at the time it was like being a in Doll house. Of course being curious I wanted to know why she was so small. I had never seen a dwarf up until that time and I could not understand why an adult would be so little!!  My Dad sensed that I was about to ask an inappropriate question so he silenced me with a Look!!  Back then you did not ask about why certain people looked different or what made them that way. It was considered bad manners.

deborah_dad_family-34
Montreal 1970

Now A Days is different. One day years ago a dwarf lady was looking at one of the paintings in my gallery. There was a little girl about 3 or 4 years of age who spotted her and like me back then was surprised to see such a small adult. Believe me kids automatically know that dwarfs are not children. Any way kids being kids she hopped right over to stare at the dwarf lady who had her back to the child. The dwarf woman feeling eyes on her turned around and smiled. No words were exchanged. The little girl went back to her stroller and the dwarf woman went back to enjoying the paintings.  I suppose the Dwarf Lady was used to kids staring at her and that’s why she smiled.

Being taught good manners and to keep my mouth shut has helped me in my current job as a museum security guard.  I see all types of people with disabilities and even though I want to know what happened I do not ask. Actually we are not allowed to say anything evenly remotely rude or inappropriate. For example Monday a young woman with no arms or legs was in my gallery. Naturally seeing someone with such an extreme disability can catch you off guard but I treat them as I treat any other visitor with a smile and assistance if needed.

 

Our Florida vacation around 1986
First Dance with My Father
Defiant precocious DeBorah
MMC 2002 Graduation
1961- A Very Good Year
Deborah Ann Palmer U.S. Army 1977-1981
Little Me
Natural Beauty
#NoMakeup
#NoMakeup

 

 

Twiggy Biography

SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2016 WEEK 5

On By dancingpalmtreesIn A Better Balance, African American Queen, Eva Gordon Palmer, Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer, FMLA, FMLA Inclusion Act, Gov. Andrew Cuomo, Let Me Call You Sweetheart, Shinnyo-en Buddhism, Sylvester, Uncategorized, Vice President Joe Biden4 Comments

 

SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2016 WEEK 5

If you had a shelf for your three most special possessions (not including photos, electronic devices and things stored on them, people or animals), what would you put on it?

My Grandmother Eva Palmer’s Musical Sewing Box.  It plays “Let Me Call You Sweetheart.”  My collection of African-American figurines.  Some special edition Collectors plates created by African-American artists.

Grandmother Eva’s Music Sewing Box
Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer — Grandmother Music Sewing Box

If you had a box labelled ‘happiness’, what would you put in it?

Happiness is spending time with my brother Stephen, my cat Sylvester, being outdoors in sunny warm weather, and photography.  I don’t think either Stephen or Sylvester would like to be put in a box. On the other hand since Sylvester is a cat maybe he would like being in a box but definitely not Stephen!!

Sylvester in my old Laundry Bag
Sylvester Cat Yoga on the bed
Sylvester Cat Yoga Pose

What do you want more of in your life?

Free time and money!!

Daily Life List: What do you do on an average day? Make a list of your usual activities you do each day.

Since I still work a full-time job I spend Tuesday through Saturday at my workplace.

Working in the security field I spend a lot of time at work since the job entails generous amounts of overtime. So between my commute which is one hour going and another hour returning home, plus 8 to 12 hours spent on the job that’s pretty much the majority of my time. This is why I enjoy my Sunday/Monday weekends and look forward to retiring in Spring 2018.

Bonus question:  What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

Being invited by Gov. Andrew Cuomo the the Paid Family Leave Rally held last Friday at the McBurney 14th Street YMCA!! It’s not every day that a working class woman like me gets a call from the Governors Office!! Kudos for Gov. Andrew Cuomo for reading the New York Times article done on me and Stephen last year.

Hearing Gov. Cuomo and Vice President Joe Biden speak and endorse Paid Family Leave was an exhilarating experience!!  As some of my long-time Followers know I’ve been fighting to get FMLA from my job so I can care for my developmentally disabled brother Stephen. Truly it has been a long and winding road but I owe many Thanks to Congressman Hakeen Jeffries, my legal Team from A Better Balance, Gov. Andrew Cuomo who I have faith will push through and make Paid Family Leave a reality for the citizens of New York and Vice President Joe Biden!!

 

(7) DeBorah and A Better Balance

Thank you.
http://nyti.ms/1BktTeP

 

Getting Our Blessing!!

 

http://www.twcnews.com/nys/capital-region/capital-tonight-interviews/2016/01/29/dina-bakst-012916.html

 

Looking forward to attending Buddhist Prayer and Meditation Services at Shinnyo-en New York City temple with my Japanese girlfriend. I thank all my Friends whether they be Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu or Buddhist for their unwavering support and encouragement in my efforts to secure FMLA for Stephen.

Stephen Vincent Palmer ~ The Man. The Myth and The Legend!!

On By dancingpalmtreesIn Edward Palmer, Genetic lineage, Genetic Memory, Mable Elizabeth Palmer, Mable Palmer5 Comments

Stephen Vincent Palmer ~ QCP Christmas Party 2013
Stephen Vincent Palmer ~ QCP Christmas Party 2013

TESTIMONY & PRAISE REPORT TIME!! Just learning of Stephen’s photography talent testifies to the Glory and Greatness of God! Back in 1963 when my parents took Stephen to various doctors trying to find out my their son age 2 did not speak, these idiot stupid doctors told my parents that Stephen, then a two year old child would never amount to anything, could not be trained, could not learn and that they should give up and place him in an institution, which in those days would have been Willowbrook.  I Thank God every day for my parents faith and persistence that their child could and would learn.

Those of us over 45 know and remember the horrors Geraldo Rivera discovered at that terrible place. Thank you Lord that my parents did not listen to the dumb doctors but took their son, my brother home to raise him as normal as possible. Today thanks to my parents, the caring staff people at QCP & AABR, my brother Stephen Vincent Palmer is a living testimony in what God can do in and with the lives of developmentally disabled/mentally challenged persons if they get the right help, support & encouragement. Also remember that a few months ago Gov. Andrew Cuomo wanted to cut the budget for developmentally disabled citizens of New York once again condemning them to the warehousing of 1960s & 1970s. Wake Up People!! Without kindness, compassion and professionalism of Ms. Lopez at QCP Stephen might have never discovered and cultivated this hidden gift for photography. Please don’t allow our government to short change our disabled American citizens!!  A person is not a label or a disability.  They are more than what or who society says there are. Stephen is living proof of that!  I’m also very Thankful and give much gratitude to AABR Stephen’s training center for nearly 30 years which has equipped him with job skills that give him a place in the workplace and a sense of personal pride and accomplishment!

Stephen and I in December 1961.
Stephen and I in December 1961.

While at the QCP (164th Street in Queens) Holiday party I discovered that my brother Stephen is a budding photographer. Stephen has taken some outstanding photos. Ms. Mynra Lopez, the Artistic director for QCP is seeking gallery space to showcase the excellent photography skills of developmentally disabled adults at QCP. We’re looking for a Spring 2016 debut. Oh yes an interesting addendum to all this is that our Dad Edward G. Palmer was avid photographer so I suppose Stephen and I both possess the photography genes. Please email, private message or call me so we can make this happen for adults with autism and cerebral palsy. Thanks!