Stylin’ Sibs and Family!!


Stephen and I have been Stylin’ since we were babies.  I grew up as a Girly Girl. A real Clotheshorse especially when I was younger. I had more shoes in my closet than Imelda Marcos and after I moved into my own apartment the clothes bar in my closet broke under the weight of all my outfits!  LOL!! My Dad used to joke that I had to get dressed just to put out the garbage. I think that I took after my Aunt Thelma who had those same attributes and passed them along to me!!  LOL!!

I was never much on make-up (except lip stick otherwise I look like a blank slate), fake eyelashes or fake nails but since my job requires me to be on my feet for long hours bi-monthly pedicures are a must. I do get manicures but neat, short, clean with clear polish because I still must cook, clean the house and do dishes.  Of course hair care is a must!! As you can see from my photos I’ve had every hair style know to Black People from the 60s up to and including the present. Now I color my hair. I loathe gray hair. I do not look good in gray hair and let’s not advance my age more than it is already. Getting older should not include looking like a frump or a bag lady.  Yes, Vanity Thy Name is Woman!! LOL!!

My Mom Mable Elizabeth Palmer who was born in the small town of Davy, WV and raised in Dayton, Ohio also Loved to dress well. Her beauty and style are what captured the heart of my Dad Edward G. Palmer.

My Mom Mable Elizabeth Palmer.

My Paternal Aunts Thelma Palmer Varner and Helen Palmer Garcia.


Stylin’ Sibs plus Dad!!





There are No Scars without first Wounds



There are No Scars without first Wounds



Got a good report from the ENT (Ear Doctor) today. Apparently the clicking and popping noises in my right ear are due to an Eustachian tube that does not open all the way.  A simple prescription with Flonase will hopefully alleviate the problem. Actually the noises are more annoying than anything else. The ear is not painful.

Eternal Internal Chaos

Being Cut. Wounds produce scars. Sometimes Life rips the scabs off the scars before the wound has healed. Infection. Pus. Filthy. Gangrenous. Foul Smelling. The Book of Job Revisited.  An open pestilence of the soul forms. While others judge never fully knowing internal battles.  Turn and face your demons but remember they are armed also.  She who fights and runs away may live to fight another day.  The devil and his/her demons come in many forms awaiting your vulnerabilities. Your weaknesses so they can rip our your heart. Eviscerate your innards.

Rejoicing. Laughing. Watching your guts litter the battlefield which has become your graveyard. So you run. You hide and wait for Resurrection and Rebirth. You Lurk among squalid corners. Slink close to the walls like rats who relish the dark afraid to come out in the open but secretly ready. Planning your Vengeance.  This time there will be No Negotiation.  Oh Attacker! You programmed me well. I now know and embody all your devious devil devices. Your imprint is on my mind. Now I use your weapons against you!!  Beware O’ Wicked One! The Victim has now become the Victor!!

Slammed down into the red brick earth. Enemy not knowing that you can sustenance and strength each time you hit the ground. Earth Mother receives your bloody wounded corpse. Sends animation Life Force through your firmly planted feet. There. A Baobab Tree. A Mighty Oak. A Banyan Tree. Close ranks around you. Gaia protects her children. Filling a Fallen Sister with Kinetic Force. Ready to do Battle. The Enemy lies defeated before he has yet begun. Yes. Even the Forest Must have it’s Revenge. 

So now I’m back to my Royally, Bitchy, Crazy, Raunchy self. Mean and Gritty. Getting down in the City.

Earned my Advanced degrees in Chill Out and Chillaxin’ ~~ Not caring what people say or their reactions.  If you don’t want to go along for the ride. Don’t get in the car.

Bitch Mode is now in effect………..  Back to Our irregularly scheduled programming!!

Soldier Survivor!! Woman Warrior!!  Resistance Fighter!!

Using Her Blasts of Power Surges aka Hot Flashes as Weapons of Warfare!!  Mass Destruction to idiots, fools, morons and all those who get in my way….. Talk to the Hand, cause the Face ain’t Listening!


Halloween 2015
Halloween 2015


Sade – Soldier of Love





The Black Twiggy Plus Funny Story



When I was a child the other school kids used to make fun of me calling me the “Black Twiggy.”  As you can see from my childhood and young adult photos I was as thin as a rail. It was not until my 40s that I began to gain some much needed weight. Recently since my brother Stephen needed a food supplement I started back drinking Ensure. Tastes good and helps us not only maintain but to gain weight. Like Twiggy I too wanted to be a model but unlike her my dream of being a model did not come true except for mugging for the camera on this blog!!

Some of my photos Past & Present


Funny 1970 Montreal, Canada Family Vacation Story

Funny story regarding the 1970 Summer Montreal Trip with my Dad, Aunt Helen and brother Stephen. We went visit a home designed for dwarfs. Now in those days they were called midgets but the correct term in dwarf. The Lady Dwarf in the photo was born to Dwarf Parents. Her parents had constructed a house where everything was scaled down to their size. For me I was about 11 at the time it was like being a in Doll house. Of course being curious I wanted to know why she was so small. I had never seen a dwarf up until that time and I could not understand why an adult would be so little!!  My Dad sensed that I was about to ask an inappropriate question so he silenced me with a Look!!  Back then you did not ask about why certain people looked different or what made them that way. It was considered bad manners.

Montreal 1970

Now A Days is different. One day years ago a dwarf lady was looking at one of the paintings in my gallery. There was a little girl about 3 or 4 years of age who spotted her and like me back then was surprised to see such a small adult. Believe me kids automatically know that dwarfs are not children. Any way kids being kids she hopped right over to stare at the dwarf lady who had her back to the child. The dwarf woman feeling eyes on her turned around and smiled. No words were exchanged. The little girl went back to her stroller and the dwarf woman went back to enjoying the paintings.  I suppose the Dwarf Lady was used to kids staring at her and that’s why she smiled.

Being taught good manners and to keep my mouth shut has helped me in my current job as a museum security guard.  I see all types of people with disabilities and even though I want to know what happened I do not ask. Actually we are not allowed to say anything evenly remotely rude or inappropriate. For example Monday a young woman with no arms or legs was in my gallery. Naturally seeing someone with such an extreme disability can catch you off guard but I treat them as I treat any other visitor with a smile and assistance if needed.




Twiggy Biography

The Struggle Continues………..


Went for a Follow-up visit to my G.P. My doctor found my pulse and blood pressure to be normal. Gained some much needed weight. Received my Flu Shot. Made appointments with the ENT specialist and gastro specialist. Will see the ENT today to find out the cause of the clicking and popping noises in my right ear. As for the gastro he is booked until November. So must wait until then. All in all a good doctor visit. Doctor also says much of my joint pain will subside once I retire. Prolonged standing, in my case 8 to 12 hours a day is not good for anyone.

One thing I wanted to add especially for my new Followers/Subscribers is that I had a mini-stroke while at my job Nov. 2008. I was lucky in the sense that I had the stroke at work because I live alone and if I had the stroke at home I would have been dead. Unlucky in that job-related stress can either disable or kill you. Since 2008 I have had Retina Surgery and been rushed to the hospital several times for various ailments.  So far 2016 has been a good year for me just because no hospital visits or stays. However I must admit to myself I am getting older and with age come health issues.

Group Home Update

I spoke with the director of my brother Stephen’s Residence yesterday. He will conduct an inventory of his clothing and email it to me. For those of you who wonder why I don’t go there in person the reason being that I can no longer drive. That stroke I previously mentioned took much of the vision in my left eye. Stephen’s residence is not accessible either by subway or bus. The nearest bus stop is probably a mile away from the Group Home. I do not have anyone to drive me nor do I have the money or funds to hire a taxi to take me there.

Call Out

I notice from my last post about my troubles with the staff at Stephen’s group home that most of the comments were about what I should be doing. Who I should be calling, etc… Now if I could or had the power to do any of these things I would be doing them. I suppose those of you who commented meant well but put yourself in my place. I’m Alone. I have NO Support System. ALL my immediate family are DEAD!!  There are no programs/services available to full-time working Siblings that could help me.

For those of you who commented Put yourself in my place. Imagine ALL your family were deceased and I mean ALL. On top of that imagine working a low-paying job where you are barely making ends meet and your employer frowned on family leave. It is very difficult or nearly impossible for me to get time off for either Stephen or myself.  As much as I Love my brother there are things that I cannot do anymore. I need someone right here, right now, physically available who can help me. See below NY Times Article.

The New York Times did an article on my brother Stephen and me. Please take time to read this eye opening article of our lives. Thank you.


Between 2008 and early 2014 I actually had to go to the local Food Pantries in my neighborhood in order to eat. I’ve had to apply for government assistance even though I work hours and hours of overtime just trying to meet my needs.  In 2014 my finances got a little better for a very short period of time. I was able to eat better and actually buy some winter clothes that kept me warm. New York City has brutal winters.  Finally this year I declared Bankruptcy. Yes my finances are that bad.

As for my join pain, gastro problems and arthritis I won’t go into the lurid, nasty disgusting details but I don’t have any more sick leave because I’m always sick. There are days when I can’t get out of bed or function. There is nobody for me to call on for help. All my vacations are Staycations because I can’t afford to go anywhere and the money I do have is spent on doctors and searching for ways to alleviate chronic pain. Plus I’m tired No Not Just tired but physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted.

Those of you who talk about my capabilities/abilities or whatever trust me I have none otherwise none of these bad things would be happening.

Of course many times when I really feel burdened I wish I had somebody to talk to but in reality that person does not exist. If they do exist please provide me with the money to get there.

My Life was not always this way. When I was younger I did not have these health problems.  For my Blog Newcomers I served my country in the military, the United States Army from Nov. 1977 – Nov. 1981, Please Don’t Thank me. I cannot eat or pay my rent with Thanks. Instead encourage Uncle Sam to be a better Uncle and provide more and better services to Women Veterans. I went to college and graduated with honors.

My downfall came partly from the economic crash the United States experienced from the time I got laid off from my good job Dec. 2006 right before Christmas and the rest from the steady decline of my health even though I never smoked, never did drugs, rarely drank and always did some moderate exercise.

It’s always easy to say what a person under extreme stress should or should not be doing but Keep in Mind You Know Neither their Story or Their Song.

Sometimes bad luck is irreversible.  Sadly in my case all the balls I’ve been trying to juggle have fallen on the floor and I can’t reach them.  All I can do is stand in wonder looking at them lying there and continue to wonder how I got to this point in Life.