These are the people who help take care of my brother Stephen. Please support the Direct Care Workers. Come out to the Rally on March 11th. If you cannot come out to the rally to increase the salaries of Direct Care Professions please call, write, or email Gov. Andrew Cuomo. Thank you. Unfortunately because of my work schedule I cannot be at the Rally. Those of you who have been following over a period of time know that it has been next to impossible for me to get time off work for Stephen or to extend my Autism Activism/Advocacy. More or less I’m doing my Autism Advocacy with my hands tied behind my back.
Somebody please tell me why people like my brother Stephen do not have value in this country? Why aren’t the Direct Care Workers paid a living wage? I’m afraid. I’m afraid for Stephen. If the Direct Care Workers are not there then who will care for him? How will I hold down a full-time job and take care of my brother also? It is very difficult to be happy when you don’t know what the future holds for yourself or your developmentally disabled Loved one.
The Cost of Compassion
GET READY TO RAAALLLYYY!!!
We support the Governors proposal to raise minimum wage to $15 an hour in
NYS –
but there is NO MONEY IN HIS PROPOSED BUDGET to pay for it!
We need additional funding to pay workers the increased wages and to raise
lower paid staff salaries so they don’t lose ground when the minimum is
raised.
Why Therapy and Mindfulness does not work for people like me. Don’t make me angry. You won’t like me when I’m angry. Watch Out!! Imma bought pull out a can of Whoop Ass on you! Love & Light. Well Let me Light yo’ dumb ass right up!!
I’m about to whip somebodys ass 🙂
Tyler Perry’s Madea Goes to Jail – 12. “Anger Management”
How to take care of a Smart-Ass the Madea Way. Problem Solved.
Tyler Perry’s Madea Goes to Jail – 15. “Call the Police”
But Let Me Assure you, Now I am Living for the Lordttt… Lordtt Jesus take me ’cause they won’t let me in the Witless Protection program!! Hallelujerrrrr!!!!
Tyler Perry’s Madea Goes to Jail – 3. “Living for the Lord”
Excellent Health Reports from My Mt. Sinai formerly Roosevelt Hospital Doctors who are the best in New York City!! Got Good News phone calls from both my GYN and regular MD. All my tests came back normal! I’m totally and completely healthy!! My general practitioner did say I do need to drink more water and cut back on starch & carbs. Other than that I’m in Great Shape!!
STEPHEN VINCENT PALMER GOOD NEWS
Stephen attended a “Paint with Friends” party on Feb. 26th. Here is his artwork. Autism is No obstacle to Stephen. He is very creative and ready to express his talents!! Stephen has also successfully tried his hand with photography! I LOVE MY BROTHER STEPHEN PALMER!!
Stephen will be with me this weekend March 5th & 6th and we will take in a movie and visit local museums. A great way to end my Chillaxin’ two week vacation!
I have always seen and viewed my brother Stephen in a positive light. For me Stephen is my personal Blessing and gift from God. All of us have some degree of disability. Autism has been a Plus + for Stephen and me. Despite naysayer doctors back in 1963 who advised my parents to put Stephen in an institution Mom & Dad ignored the medical profession and raised Stephen to be a contributing member of society. Stephen will be 55 years old on May 3rd and continues to break barriers and amaze me. I know our parents are smiling down from Heaven on us!!
I’m a firm believer in selective sharing but personally I have secrets. I think everyone does. There are thoughts, feelings, emotions and experiences that I will never ever share with anyone for any reason. My parents used to say all the time “Don’t put your business out in the street.” If they were alive today they’d be appalled with these Reality TV shows/generation.
I know my grandparents keep secrets because certain life issues were better left unspoken and no one wants to keep revisiting a particularly horrendous part of their past. Since I’ve gotten older I’ve begun to piece together some of what they possibly went through in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. I remember my Dad saying my Grandfather never talked about his childhood growing up in VA. Given that Jim Crow was King of the South I suppose my Grandfather did not want to relive the horrors of the time period.
As for my maternal Grandmother Hattie Finney Banks well one did not discuss domestic violence. There were no services or programs in the 1930s so after my grandfather went to prison for murdering my Great grandfather (my grandmother’s Dad) my grandmother thought it best to make up a story that he had died in a coal mining accident. She had already went through horror, shame, & abuse so it would have been pointless to tell her 3 daughters (that included my Mom) or any of her grand-children. Both my great uncles (her brothers knew and kept the secret).
I found out a few years ago through my great aunt who went to my great grandfather’s funeral. Of course by that time all the participants were dead. My grandmother, mother and aunts have been dead for years so nobody could be embarrassed or humiliated. Age and perspective have given me the ability to understand what my grandmother went through and why she made certain decisions. Also why she never re-married. No judgment. I’ve found that most times discussing past traumatic events only dredges up old wounds and does not provide any healing whatsoever because it causes the victim to become mired in the past.
My Secrets ~~ Don’t Ask. Don’t Tell.
The few times I’ve revealed or opened up to so-called trusted friends usually ended in disaster. Confided in somebody I thought I could trust the extreme stress I was going through. Like last year when I wound up in the hospital. Psych ward. Horrible experience.
The drugs I was forced to take during this time period turned me into a zombie. I nearly lost my job. All my hospitalization did was make worse and magnify all my problems.
Akin to prison incarceration. The cure was worse than the disease. Two weeks of misery. The only thing that saved me was the advice of an intake nurse who said, “You’re smart. Tell them what they want to hear.” Which is exactly what I did. Learned to make myself small. Play their game and eventually I was released. Therapists, psychologists and psychiatrists want you to discuss past events that cannot be changed. I find that totally pointless. Why do you want me to tell what happened to me in the 1970s or any other time period? What positive changes would that bring about for me?
Mental health professionals have only made me more suspicious, cynical and jaded. I have found in general that the only reason people want you to confide in them is to take your flaws and weaknesses to use against you. A form of blackmail. I also do not trust folks who call themselves Life Hackers, Life Coaches, these Happy Talk talking heads who remind me of Maximum Headroom,or any other nonsense going around today.
Max Headroom, The Best Bits Ever!
Anyway I can truthfully say I learned my lesson. Lost friends in the process but I do believe I’m a better person for all that has happened to me. My Life. My Decisions. My Choices.
Through research I pieced together Grandmother’s story which in many ways became my story.
Espiritu en Fuego/A Fiery Spirit 