I Am Not a Stereotype


I am not a Stereotype

Stereotypes Hurt.  No More Labels!!

Women of all colors, races, religions ethnic groups and nationalities face double jeopardy.

I will not be defined by the narrow conventions of your mangled mind.

Me and Patti LaBelle got a new attitude.

http://youtu.be/7jHToFiZuSU

I will not be typecast by the slant of my eyes, the color of my skin or country of origin.

I am a Woman of faith of dignity who demands and commands respect.

I refuse to suffer indignities of your racist sexist perversions.

I follow the laws of God as dictated by my belief system whatever it may be.

I am not an exotic playtoy or life size Barbie doll existing only to gratify, satisfy or fulfill your twisted sadistic carnal predilections.

I am not the one and today is not your day.

I will not be afraid and will not back down.

I am not a victim.

I am more than a survivor.

I am defiant.

You do not have license to ill.

My height, weight, shape do not delineate me as a loose woman or a hot number.

I am not your Ethiopian Chocolate Fantasy or submissive Asian delight found in the back covers of men’s magazines.

I am not your Indian Maiden with feathers in her hair or a sari wrapped around her waist.

If I’m a Lesbian nothing between your legs will make me straight and certainly does not impress me.

Whatever fever you got, be it Jungle Fever, Yellow Fever, Red Fever, Hot Spicy Latina Fever, I’m about to throw cold water all over it and knock you out cold. Get over yourself. You’re not all that and a bag of chips.

I choose who, when, where and if I will lay my body down.

I am the Goddess and only the worthy may gain access to the Temple. As Women we are called to maintain order in the Universe. Ladies ~ Realize your calling.

Asshole Repellent
Asshole Repellent

Ladies sexual abuse, workplace bullying and sexual harassment is the Elephant in the Room that everybody sees but fails to acknowledge its presence. Instead we step lightly around him hoping he will go away of his accord. Do not remain silent. Speak up. Speak out.

Package Delivery


Funny Moment when a guy’s rap about his package nearly does him in

Getting off the J train at Broadway Junction and this young guys looking at a girl on the train telling her, “It’s this long” — well Mr. Super Stud walks right into the steel column along the platform and nearly knocks himself out. BAM!! You know that shit hurt!

I did chuckle a bit but I had to get me and my groceries back home in one piece!! He did try to play it off though. I think those humongous Beats by Dr. Dre headphones kept him from further injury. Perhaps he is practicing to be a future Anthony Weiner but those of us in New York know what happened to him and even though he’s running for Mayor Mr. Weiner will never live down exposing his little wiener via Twitter.

Perhaps Mr. Big Stuff should concentrate on getting something into his big head instead of focusing on impressing a girl with the little head. Stud Muffin wins this week’s Darwin Award.

Does Size matter?
Does Size matter?

 

Old Skool with a Classic 8-Track Flashback. Mr. Big Stuff ~ http://youtu.be/9f4CyQto-0E

 

I’m Gonna Keep Sitting on it Scrubs


Storm
Storm — Power over the Elements

I live in Bodega-Land, Brooklyn. Exchange at the Bodega across from the Laundromat. I’m wearing an old Ecko Red short sleeve shirt and some skinny jeans. I’m waiting for my Beef Patty with cheese and coco bread. While I’m paying for my food and drink I get the following rap from Snagglepuss. “Ya keep ya body nice. Can I get your number and can I give you mine.” I’m polite and keep that smile on my face knowing I’m about to reject this fool because I don’t want any confrontation before I get to eat my food or check my clothes washing across the street.

He notices that I speak proper English and says; I see that you’re an intellectual. Hmmm I’m thinking just because I live in the Ghetto doesn’t mean I must lapse into Ghettoese or Ebonics. Crooked teeth continues, maybe you and me can get together and discuss spirituality, blah, blah, blah, bullshit. You know the way that Rasta Negro was eyeing me up and down his mind wasn’t on the things of God or any type of Spiritual talk. Leon Spinks just wanted to find a way to get some “Coochie”. I lied and told him I had a boyfriend. I just wanted to get away from his sorry ass, finish my food and get my laundry done. Mission Accomplished.

However in the words of the immortal Ruth Brown, “I’ll Just Keep Sitting on it. I ain’t giving it away.” Rochdale Village had its share of old coots prowling for “Coochie” I see Brownsville/Bed Stuy has it’s own share of horny fools with really lame game.
http://youtu.be/KPll4sQDssU

 

Talk to the Hand cause the Face ain't Listening.
Talk to the Hand cause the Face ain’t Listening.

Ladies, always remember Men are like the City Bus there’s another one coming in 20 minutes hopefully with good teeth, fresh breath, who bathes and uses deodorant.

Honey if you’re game is lame and your rap is weak don’t even think of stepping to me. No romance without finance. And no I don’t do Ugly, fat or Stupid. I may be broke but I’m never desperate. I’d work 40 hours of overtime before I hook up with your no job, no car, no talking sorry hoodrat/thug/bad boy ass. Been there. Done That. Paid the Price.

http://youtu.be/pKV8uSX2nEQ

TLC -- No Scrubs
TLC — No Scrubs

Ladies you gotta let these men know what’s up. They telling you they can do acrobatics with their dick! Really! Are they fucking double jointed or contortionists? Give me a fucking break. Please! Why is their dick so much more special than any other. Is it extra long? Does it swing from side to side. WTF! Then they a fucking freak and belong in Ripleys Believe it or Not. Or maybe they should be making porno films. I’m older and wiser now. Dick don’t mesmerize me anymore. Get something in your head or you’ll never get me in bed. My body is my temple and only my true King who I choose can enter in. Don’t get it twisted. Little boy your package does not impress me.  In the meantime Losers give your Ding-A-Ling a hand job.

My Ding-A-Ling

 

Ladies if you’ve had the best don’t settle for less.

Get up off your broke ass, fix your face , see a dentist and fix your teeth, and get an education and a decent job. If you can’t come correct don’t come at all.

Hello Summer in the City!

 

Talk to the hand cause the face ain't listening.
Talk to the hand cause the face ain’t listening.

 

 

Tiger, Tiger Burning Bright — Ms. Bachuta’s Revenge


Tiger, Tiger burning Bright – Ms. Bachuta’s Revenge

Warning this post is not politically correct and may be offensive to some. However if you were a fan of Richard Pryor, George Carlin, Moms Mabley or LaWanda Page (Aunt Esther) read on for another WTF  New York news story.

Sumatra Tiger
Sumatra Tiger

Yo Joe! Joe! Did you order take out? No then who’s this muthafucker in our cage? Where’s the babies, Ivette & Yvonne. RaeKwon get the hell away from there. What I tell you about messing around in that part of the den. This white muthfucka damn near fell on your head.

Shit! Who gives a damn! Come on y’all. Dinner is served. We gonna have white meat tonight. Might be a sight better than the regular Bronx Zoo crap we get every day! Hey he broke his fuckin’ leg in the fall! Easy pickin’s. Hold still ya dumb bastard! Gotta get that fool before the dumb ass Zoo Keepers rescue him!

CHOMP!!

I still can’t get over the fact that this idiot jumped off the damn monorail and into the Tiger’s den to commit suicide. There are easier, quicker and less painful ways to do away with yourself. Why not just swallow some sleeping pills, Xanax and top it off with a few cocktails. At least you’d just go to sleep and wake up somewhere else. No Jackass had to become one with the tiger. I guess the tiger Ms. Bachuta taught him a thing or to. Morale of the story: Don’t Fuck with Tigers from the Bronx or anywhere else!

The Mills Brothers– Hold That Tiger (Tiger Rag)

http://youtu.be/P0GKbpSN3nA

Give this dumbass a Darwin Award! Sorry but most Black people don’t even swim much less get near dangerous wild animals. So far I only know of one brother who had a Wild Kingdom obsession. This Negro had a tiger (again!) and an alligator in his Harlem apartment. The policeman who came upon these creatures unexpectedly probably almost shit himself. Well maybe he did shit himself. I know I would have.

Black people despite being separated from Africa over 400 years have collective memories about wild animals. That’s why up until recently there were next to no Black swimmers in the Olympic competition and plenty in Track & Field. Why are Black folks so good at running? Because genetic memory throws us into “Haul Ass” mode, recalling running from tigers, lions, and various other predators with sharp teeth! To this day I betcha very few Africans jump in the old swimming hole next to the village. Why? Muthafuckin hippos & alligators! I don’t care if they are herbivores.  Them muthafuckers got teeth and they bite. Get on their surf & turf and you will be lunch or dinner. Also keep in mind every last one of those nature show hosts have been white. Go ahead keep fuckin’ with those animals. Look what happened to Steve Irwin. Leave the fuckin’ crocodiles, alligators and tigers alone!

The Five Racketeers “Hold That Tiger”

http://youtu.be/bwfHD8MDP8o

I could go into why white people also go investigate weird noises and/or sounds in horror movies but as the expression goes curiosity the cat or in this case the Caucasian. That saying is wrong because cats got nine lives and are very good at sensing danger.  Well that’s for another post.

Donations and Freewill offerings can be made directly to my PayPal account deborah.palmer280@gmail.com

Bengal Tiger
Bengal Tiger