That idiot moron psycho illegally occupying the Oval Office needs to remember this poem which is part of the Statue of Liberty. Many times when I have taken Circle Line and other local New York cruises around Manhattan I have passed by this Grand Lady holding her torch high to welcome people from ALL Races and Religions. Yes my ancestors were forcibly brought here but this is my home as it became the home of my ancestors who came to these shores dating back to the early 1800s. Though my family came here as slaves we distinguished ourselves and a good many of my family members including myself served in the Military to defend our homeland.
As much as white Christian Americans Love telling me to “Go Back to Africa” a place I’ve never been though I do intend to visit my ancestral homeland one day, America is my home. Here I will stay unless the homicidal maniac either deports me and Stephen or lines us up against his wall to be shot and killed.
“The New Colossus” is a sonnet that American poet Emma Lazarus (1849–1887) wrote in 1883 to raise money for the construction of the pedestal of the Statue of Liberty.[2] In 1903, the poem was engraved on a bronze plaque and mounted inside the pedestal’s lower level.
Remember how I was moaning and groaning over the extremely high Con Edison bill and thought I was not going to be able to go away end of Feb/March 2017. Well I was wrong! I received this great email message a few days ago.
Hello, Deborah.
Thanks so much for your note and glad to hear of your interest and plans.
MetroNorth from Grand Central or 125th Street is the way to come — and it ends in New Haven at Union Station here. Beinecke Library is downtown in the heart of the Yale campus, an easy taxi/Uber from the station (and a nice enough walk if the weather is decent).
The Yale University Art Gallery, among other venues on campus, are also worth checking out on a visit. Yale’s art museums, like Beinecke’s exhibitions, are free and open to the public. The Yale Calendar of Events — http://calendar.yale.edu/cal/opa — and Yale Arts Calendar — http://artscalendar.yale.edu/ — are great resources.
P.S. ~~ All that overtime I do helped me pay my half of the bill. My room-mate and I split the electric bill. Hard work does pay off and working on Holidays is a good thing! Mo’ Money! Mo’ Money! Mo’ Money!
So Yes I will be going to see the Yale Harlem Renaissance special exhibit for my birthday!! Hooray!! Maybe not right on Feb. 27th which will be my BornDay Celebration but I plan to take that week off on vacation anyway. My only consideration will be the weather as Snowstorms put an end to train travel. But with God’s Blessings and Divine Favor it will NOT Snow and the temps will rise to the 40s at least for my vacation week!
On the subject of Vacation Big Ups to both my Supervisors who are excellent young Ladies! They are a Blessing to work with. We work well together. They have a sense of humor and are Flexible! I know I’ve said this before but I cannot repeat it enough, I’m so Glad and Happy I moved to the Evening/Night Shift!! The rest of my co-workers on both the evening and night shifts are Super Nice. We have each others back and support each other. My work environment is the best its been in 8 years. This is my 9th year at the museum and I’m so Blessed to be with a community of people who are fun to be with.
As for Saratoga, well I did go there with my Dad many years ago and I thoroughly enjoyed our trip. My Dad Edward G. Palmer was a true Blessing for me and my brother Stephen as he took us many places and exposed us to locations outside New York City.
When I was in the military Daddy had more Father/Son bonding time. Daddy and Stephen went on an Alaskan cruise! I’m sure they had fun. Stephen was very close to Daddy and even though he can’t really tell me what they did I’m sure Stephen has fond memories of the Cruise.
The moral of the Story is that and always is God answers prayer. Maybe not in the way we want or on our time line but the Lord always comes through. For that I am Grateful.
As the Mothers of the Church used to say, God will make a way out of no way! Say Amen Somebody!!
1 Chronicles 4:10
New King James Version (NKJV)
10 And Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, “Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!” So God granted him what he requested.
Jeremiah 29:11 New King James Version (NKJV)
11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Today’s meeting with the Director of Stephen Residence went well. Better than expected. New Year 2017. Blank Slate. Fresh Start.
So glad I had the opportunity to speak directly one on one with the Director of QCP. I’ve known him a long time and I do trust him. I feel he values my opinion and will address my concerns regarding the clothing issues.
Gradually I’m starting to throw away my cynicism, doubts, becoming jaded and distrustful of other human beings. At one point I nearly lost faith in all humanity. We are all connected and in many ways that we don’t even realize or think about we are all connected. Not everyone is trying to throw you under the bus.
Of course like everyone I’ve had bad experiences and some horrible interactions with others and that includes my own family members but the actions of a few does not mean everyone you meet in your life will do the same thing to you. We are never really totally self-reliant. Most of us do not grow our own food or make our own clothes. So-called self-reliant Freedoms we take for granted during the peak of our youth and strength will be taken from you as old age, infirmities and disabilities settle in and become the new normal.
After my stroke at age 49 my life changed dramatically. I went through what I believe are the 7 stages of grief. For the longest I was alternately depressed and angry because I could not longer do the things I used to do like drive. My eyesight was affected by the stroke and I lost a good deal of vision in my left eye. So I cannot drive. I have difficulty reading books, signs, documents, etc…
Eventually over the last 8 years I’ve had to throw away my pride and accept help. Due to arthritis my back, legs, ankles, knees and joints no longer work the way they once did. God in his mercy has sent many rescuers to my aid but I had to drop my bad attitude, have faith and accept help. As the banks and financial institutions say, Past performance is not indicative of future results. I cannot allow my past including the abuse I suffered from men, racism, discrimination, bigotry and even some of my paternal cousins shunning me and Stephen affect my current or future interactions with people.
Back in 2012 I had several traumatic experiences. I split up with a guy whom I really cared for and had fallen in Love with but because his parents had died he had to return to the Eastern European country of his birth. It hurt. During this time period I also had a falling out with certain paternal cousins who I had cared for and supported when they fell on hard times. Yes they turned their backs on me. That really hurt because we were all raised up together. I cried. I felt abandoned. After all your family is supposed to Love you but we all know in reality that is not always the truth.
Finally I had a very strange experience while posted in a special Civil War photo exhibit. As many of you may have read in my previous blogs I had an ancestor William Henry Halstead who served as a Union Soldier. Well don’t ask me how but my Great, Great Grandfather made contact with me and I found myself in the midst of one of the battles he was in. I heard cannon fire, felt bullets whizzing by me. I heard the cries of the wounded. Their screams. I felt my Great, Great Grandfather William Henry Halstead fear and anxiety. The whole vision was unsettling.
I needed answers so I prayed to Jesus to send someone who would help me. Jesus sent me a Japanese Buddhist Lady who today has become one of my strongest friends. Guess Jesus has both a sense of humor and the knowledge/wisdom to send the right person despite that person being a different race/religion.
I can be a very difficult person yet she put up with me. Listen to my troubles. We went together to her Temple Shinnyo-en New York which I later joined. Now I’ve had my ups and downs but on Jan. 15th my Japanese girlfriend and I are going to the Main Temple located in White Plains. We will be together as Sisters. American and Japan. Buddhist and Christian.
As my mother Mable Palmer used to tell me, “Deborah you never know who you may have to call on.”
Just want to point out that when Stephen cannot do something and I ask him if he needs help he says Yes right away. I need to be more like my brother in some ways.
Lately especially since I turned 50 several years ago I’ve been to more wakes and funerals than birthdays. My generation, Baby Boomers are passing away. The baton is being passed to the Millennials. Turning 50 seems to be the catalyst for health problems and medical issues. One of the few good things about 2016 is that this is the first year since 2008 that I have not been in the hospital as a patient. Actually my health drama began at age 49 with a mini-stroke that had my life literally passing before my eyes. Facing death you realize how much you want to live but after turning 50 you already know you’ve live more than half your life and there are more years behind you than in front of you.
This is why I dread Christmas and I don’t make a big deal of the Holiday season. Christmas usually brings bad news mostly somebody has died.
Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years have become one long anxiety and panic attack for me.
I know next year to avoid discussing despised fake, phony Christmas I’m gonna do a moratorium on posting after Veteran’s day until the first week in January has passed. I don’t want to deal with any more Holiday Greetings and I’m tired of putting on an act of a season I’ve come to hate with a passion.
Now obviously I will attend the company Christmas party because I don’t want to be thought of as a Grinch and I’m happy for the folks who do celebrate. More power to them and I Love to eat. Goodies are available.
Truthfully Christmas means absolutely NOTHING TO ME!! Jesus was not born on December 25th and he was Jewish!! If Jesus were on earth today he would be celebrating Hanukkah not Christmas!! As a Christian I see no point in make believe cheer during the holidays and those same people who wish you Happy Holidays will curse you out January 2nd.
Most important that the commercialism and merchandising of Christmas is the state of your soul. Your standing with God in whatever ever belief system you follow. When you die God will not ask you anything about Christmas but rather how you treated your fellow human beings for your time on this earth.
I know my time to meet the Lord is coming. Perhaps sooner than later. As my Dad used to say, “Straighten up and Fly Right.” Or to quote my Grandmother Hattie Finney Banks, “It’s time to Get Right with God!”
The only thing that matters to me now is my status or right standing with the Lord!
2 Corinthians 5:8
King James Version (KJV)
8 We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord.
CHRISTMAS WRITING PROMPT #14: WRITE A LETTER TO SANTA
Dear Santa,
#1 On my Christmas Wish List ~~ My health. Remember that mini stroke I had back in November 2008. You know the one that took a good deal of the vision in my left eye. Please reverse the effects of the stroke. Heal my back and my digestive system. I’m exhausted nearly all the time and suffer from stomach problems which makes it every difficult to do anything with my brother Stephen. Eventually because of my health I will cede most of that to his Group Home Residence and his Day Treatment Center. Yes Reverse the effects of aging. I’m spending all kinds of money that I don’t have on treatments to keep the pain and tiredness at bay with little success.
Finances
I need money. Most of the time I’m barely getting by. I look at the balance in my checking account today and there is no money for Christmas. In fact my decision is whether to celebrate Christmas or to pay my rent. Santa you know which one will win unless you come through with a whole lotta cash and be quick about it. Christmas meal will most likely be canned food, PB&J, and whatever is affordable at the local bodega. Oh yes there is the Halal food truck near my job. Cheap and tasty meals.
Explain to me why Christmas does not come to the working class or the poor. Also I’m gonna need between $3K & $4K to find a safe affordable place to live or I’m be homeless this time next year. I know you don’t visit folks in the Homeless Shelters so bring me an affordable apartment in a safe neighborhood near the subway!! I have been working Double Shifts meaning 16 hour days with little or no sleep. Fix this now!!
My Brother Stephen
I Love my brother Stephen dearly but as time goes along between my health and my lack of money I realize I won’t be able to spend as much time with him as I want unless you fix requests #1 and #2. Realistically I can’t do the things I used to do. Every month simple tasks get harder and harder. However I’m glad Stephen is in a Residence because the day is coming when my health will give out and I won’t be able to be there for him. Tell me why Life is one continuous Struggle?!
Final request. Bring back all the people; family and friends I Loved and Lost over the last 25 years. Most of all bring back my parents Edward and Mable Palmer whom I desperately need. Frankly I’m sick and tired of all the fake people who tell me to be strong and keep going with out actually lifting a finger to help me. I need my Mother and Father. I need to hear their voices. I need to hug them and be close to them. Memories are not enough they don’t work! Love from afar is no good. I want them here with me because I need their help. Sick and tired of the phony folks who live in a Fairy Tale Fantasy Make-Believe world who have all the Blessings of Life who tell those of us facing disaster just to hang on when there is nothing to hang on to!!
But I remember you don’t exist and all my wishes, hopes, dreams and goals for Christmas and 2017 will most likely go up in smoke.
However if you are real and you actual read this letter:
Espiritu en Fuego/A Fiery Spirit 