Foray into Forgiveness

On July 7, 2017 By dancingpalmtreesIn AABR, Autism, Autism Activism, Autism Activism Advocate, Stephen, Stephen Vincent Palmer, Uncategorized

For the last couple of Fridays I’ve explored the topic of Forgiveness. I did enjoy Forgiving Fridays and sharing regarding this subject. However as I run the risk of being a hypocrite I cannot continue to post about Forgiveness when I cannot Forgive.

Today at 11:00 am I have a meeting at my brother Stephen’s Day Treatment Center. The managers and directors at AABR are wonderful. See last Friday’s post. The staff at AABR has been consistent and professional for the last 30 odd years. I think they do an outstanding job in training and developing the skill set of developmentally disabled adults. They are Wonderful!!

The problem lies with Stephen’s Group Home. Stephen has lived there since 1989 and things were going well until the last two years. Since the managers are incompetent and unprofessional. This has resulted in arguments, screaming and shouting matches between myself and those in charge. The current Residence Managers deliberately say and do things just to annoy me.

I’ve reported their behavior to the Director and Executive Director without satisfaction. Unfortunately I still must deal with these idiot managers and I can truly say I despise and loathe them. They irritate me and don’t seem to understand the concept that I have a full-time job that requires me to work long extended hours of overtime. They call me for ridiculously stupid reasons. And don’t call me for more serious ones.

Last year they persisted in giving Stephen worn, torn clothing some of which was not his despite the fact that for each home visit Stephen has with me I buy him brand new clothes. Finally in January of this year I had a face to face meeting with the Director of his Group Home and had the opportunity to look inside Stephen’s dresser and armorie which were full of brand new clothes. Why they send him to me with ripped and torn clothing well I don’t know.

For those of you who have been following me for the last several years you already know that due to a stroke I no longer drive due to vision problems which I won’t rehash. That’s why I cannot get to Stephen’s Group Home and there are no buses or subways that run out there so I’m effectively shut out. You also are familiar with the trials and tribulations that I go through doing my best to care for my brother even to the point of neglecting my own health and welfare.

I have tried to forgive them but then they do something else to annoy me. You’d think that people supposedly trained in the care and treatment of adults with Autism would do better but that is not so. I’ve had to report them several times and have filed numerous complaints. If my own health was not so precarious and I had access/money for lawyers I’d transfer Stephen but I don’t have those options.

I’m looking forward to seeing Stephen but not to seeing or speaking with his Group Home Managers. I get No cooperation or understanding from them. They disgust me.

No these morons will never hear or see my forgiveness in this lifetime or the next.

I’m not going to entertainment comments as this is an upsetting and emotional issue for me and they already upset me yesterday calling me for a dumb reason asking me questions to which they already knew the answer. I was abrupt and hung up on her.

I know some people will try to engage me on this issue in future posts but trust me when I say I’ve already exercised all my options even to the point of contacting the Congressman for Stephen’s district. Therefore I’m not taking suggestions or advice. Usually once I make up my mind and make a decision I stick with it.

However next year when I retire All Hell is gonna break loose for them. They just don’t have any idea of the upcoming storm.

Now off to battle. So much for my relaxing weekend.

Forgiving Fridays ~~ InterFaith

On June 23, 2017June 16, 2017 By dancingpalmtreesIn FORGIVENESS IN THE QURAN AND SUNNAH, Forgiving Fridays, Odetta ~~ This Little Light of Mine, Pastor Lionel Sneed, The Peaceable Kingdom, Uncategorized1 Comment

https://lionelsneedministries.com/2017/05/26/thought-for-the-day-489/

Photo from Pastor Lionel Sneed

Today’s forgiving journal: Loving Myself Healthier!

Today’s forgiving journal: Freeing myself from punishment

Today’s forgiving journal: Shining my Light no matter what

This Little Light of Mine. I’m Gonna Let Shine.

Bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, if any man has a complaint against any; even as Christ forgave you, so you also do. Colossians 3:13

FORGIVENESS IN THE QURAN AND SUNNAH

http://islam.ru/en/content/story/forgiveness-quran-and-sunnah

This Man Riddled their Mosque With Bullets, now They’re Forgiving Him*

Broken Wings

On December 10, 2016December 10, 2016 By dancingpalmtreesIn Broken Wings, Island of Misfit Toys, Mr. Mister - Broken Wings, Uncategorized2 Comments

Warning: For those of you who have been raped, went through Domestic Violence, sodomized or sexually assaulted Please Do Not Read this Post as it most likely continues Triggers. I have survived all those events but to this day I still experience sights, smells, words that set me off in the wrong direction.

Swords, needles, Lance, shattered glass, Knaves with Knives pierced my heart. For the one who pinned me to the wall with gnashing fanged teeth. They made me bleed but my life essence flowed into the ground and back up through and into my feet roots.

Many times I feel I’ve been banished to the Island of Misfit toys. Long ago in a far away land I was embedded in the fog, haze and mist of various “Happy Pills.” But I escaped. They tried to recapture me last year but once again the Warrior in me arose and I beat down my foes and thus a better life was reborn.

Island of the Damned -- Bocklin — Island of the Damned by Bocklin

They tell me to forgive you. As though I were at fault.

They tell me that unless I forgive you burning coals will singe my soul. Forgiveness is for me. It will help heal my soul.

Yet I feel nothing. No pressure to forgive. No reason to forgive. No need to forgive. No guilt or shame. Because I feel nothing. Nothing for him. Nothing for all the hims that brutally attacked me. Why?! Because you, him, All the Hims have been banished, dismissed.

Those hims taught me how. Especially the one who raped me. The one who now wears the backward collar. Who leads unsuspecting congregations in Praise & Worship. Church. How convenient. The perfect place to find more victims. Women. Some willing. Carried along by a sacred oratory little knowing the ugly demon that lurks within. But I know. You come as an Angel of Light but I know who you really are. Hell is reserved for the devil and his angels. Your place in Hades awaits you.

The Persuaders – Thin Line between Love & Hate – Video (High Quality)

My heart has gone prehistoric stone implements. Flint knives now glisten in my eyes. How not to feel. How to dismiss who no longer is necessary yet keep the lessons for the future. How to dispatch with a cold ease. Victory!

I’M STILL HERE!!

To awaken a side of me that can put my abusers into compartments. Jails. I will never forget what they did. How they changed my life. Little did they know how my life has changed for the better. I don’t need to forgive for I am not at fault. And they. They shall receive due judgment from the Creator of All Life and I. I will sit back and smile.

My Salvation, Forgiveness and Redemption Belong Only to Me!

For I have learned to Fly again.

Anger Mgmt 101

On July 30, 2016July 30, 2016 By dancingpalmtreesIn DeBorah, DeBorah Ann Palmer, Edward G. Palmer, Edward Gordon Palmer, Edward Palmer, LL Cool J - Mama Said Knock You Out, Mable Elizabeth Palmer, Mable Palmer, Nubia, Nubian Ninja, Phenomenon - LL Cool J, U.S. Army Veteran, Uncategorized, Vietnam27 Comments

Today at work I had a good laugh. One of the male security guards actually went to one of our Lady Shop Stewards to complain that his feelings were hurt because I stop speaking to him. I nearly burst out laughing but I managed to contain my chuckles because dickhead knew very well why I stopped speaking to him.

After a prior incident where he not only insulted me but had nerve to do it in front of the visitors well I blasted him good. My initials stand for Don’t Play. This is a job where we are required to be professional. If you got beef with me you need to talk to me in private not in front of the general public. I warned him then and there that I don’t know who you think you’re talking to but you picked the wrong one. Unfortunately if you work in a department that’s mostly male you’re gonna have men who challenge you or attempt to intimidate you.

I don’t do challenge or intimidation. Just because you’re a man does not make you better or smarter than me. Since his dumb ass is not a supervisor you need to watch what you say to me. Even if you are a supervisor if you talk out of turn I’m gonna speak up for myself.

I’m one that once you mess with me unless you apologize I’m not forgiving you. Fuck Forgiveness. Fuck Feelings. Wrong Female. I don’t owe you anything. There is No Love nor Light. The only Light you will get from me is when I Light your ass up! And that’s not a Light you want to experience. I Do Not Tolerate any disrespect from anybody. It’s that simple!!

Mable and Edward Palmer did not raise me to be a doormat. In fact my parents told me not to take crap off anyone and that I had a right to defend myself.

LL Cool J – Mama Said Knock You Out

Mr. Angry Asshole had offended several co-workers and many stopped talking to him. Many years ago he was demoted from a higher security position because of his temper. His anger has gotten the better of him to the point that he has had several heart attacks. At least one on the premises and he is not even 50 years old!

I think he feels I should and I must converse with him because we are both Veterans. Well I’m a Veteran all he is and was what we in the Military call Weekend Warriors. Meaning he was in the Reserves. One weekend out of the month and two weeks out of the year of actual service. I was in four years full-time, 24/7/365.

Just to show you how truly nasty Mr. Numb-nuts is we have a gentleman who is also a security officer who served bravely during the Vietnam War. This wonderful man actually saw action. He suffers from PTSD but goes out of his way to be extra nice to all our co-workers. He is a pleasure to work with. He follows the Catholic faith always with his prayer beads and follows Jesus teachings. Everyone Loves him. Except one person. Guess who? You guessed right! Private Jackass. The Lumpy Paleface Lunatic actually had the nerve to badmouth a great man who went through the trauma of seeing people killed and trying to save the lives of wounded soldiers (he was a medic).

As for Knucklehead most of the guards try to avoid him. He has very few friends. Not many will put up with his rude, nasty, sarcastic remarks. I’m all for humor, cracking jokes and laughter but making fun of people, insults, lack of proper communication skills and zero people skills are not acceptable.

I have not guilt nor shame in cutting ties with abusive co-workers. That person does not write my checks nor are they paying my bills. Forgive and Forget don’t work here. I will dismiss you and keep on stepping. I have no shame in my game.