State of Mind

This week, let your inner world and the outside one converge in a photo.

Billy Joel – New York State of Mind (Audio)

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New York Skyline as seen from Central Park

Harlem blues

Jay Z Empire State of Mind featuring Alicia Keys Lyrics

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Jay-Z & Alicia Keys Perform Empire State of Mind (AMA’s 2009)

The Classic One and Only Frank Sinatra

Frank Sinatra – New York, New York

The Road Less Traveled | The Daily Post

On February 21, 2016 By dancingpalmtreesIn 101st Airborne Division, 569th PSC, Army, The Road Less Traveled | The Daily Post, U.S. Army, Uncategorized, United States Army6 Comments

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/the-road-less-traveled/

Feb 21, 2016

The Road Less Traveled

Pinpoint a moment in your past where you had to make a big decision. Write about that other alternate life that could have unfolded.

Major Decision #1

November 1977 to November 1981 when I joined the United States Army. This gave me the opportunity to not only serve my country but travel to Europe and meet people from all over the United States. I did my Basic and AIT at Ft. Jackson, SC. I was posted at the 569th PSC in Augsburg, Germany and at the 101st Airborne Division located at Ft. Campbell, KY. During my four years in the Army I also went TDY (temporary duty) at various bases inside and outside the U.S.

The Army reinforced the sense of discipline, accountability and responsibility that my parents Edward and Mable Palmer had already implanted within me. I received an Honorable Discharge and am very proud to be a U.S. Army Veteran.

1978 Augsburg, Germany

Deborah Ann Palmer U.S. Army 1977-1981

Major Decision #2

September 1995 when I decided to move forward in earning my BA at Marymount Manhattan College. My Dad Edward G. Palmer had just passed away that year May 13, 1995 at age 65 and I then became responsible for both my mother Mable Palmer and my brother Stephen Palmer. I felt I needed to get my BA as being a College graduate was both my Dad’s desire and mine but I was just too busy running around living free and easy. Once my Father died I inherited his responsibilities and I felt that college would give me an up in terms of critical thinking and advancing my then career.

Being a student was both exhilarating and challenging. At that time Marymount Manhattan College was a private Women’s Catholic college which had just begun to admit men on a limited scale. Therefore the classes were small and the professors took a personal interest in the intellectual and educational development of each student. By the time I went to MMC all the instructors were secular not the Nuns that had preceded them many years before. The professors and the Dean were dedicated to helping Ladies succeeded especially returning Women students like myself.

At that time I was 36 years old definitely not a teenager but an adult who worked full-time and a caregiver. I did briefly attend Marymount Manhattan College around 1987/88 but being in my 20s was my wild & crazy period so I did not stick it out even though I was doing very well in school. Not to say the professors were easy on the students in terms of work load. There were tons of novels and other books to read and 25 page research papers to write on a bi-weekly basis. I suppose it was stressful but a positive stress. An intellectual challenge and I rose to the occasion.

Entering college as an adult I knew that I wanted to major in English literature unlike an 18 year old who is inexperienced with the world in general and probably has very little work experience. At age 36 I had already served my country as a soldier in the United States Army and had many years in the workplace. Many people including some relatives kept asking me “Why are you majoring in English? Are you going to become a teacher?” My answer then as now is I Love English literature and I knew I could pass and no I had no intentions of becoming a teacher.

My Mom who was still living at the time never asked me any ridiculous questions. She was happy that I cared for her, went to work, studied hard in school and went to church. Mom was proud of me and my accomplishments. Sadly my mother followed my Dad into the hereafter August 1998 at age 68. Neither she nor my Dad ever got to see me graduate from Marymount Manhattan College May 2002 when I was 43 however their spirits spurred me on to successfully complete a difficult year long course called Women in Urban Leadership, make the Deans List in 1999 and graduate Cum Laude. Both my parents were born in 1930 at a time when racism, lynchings, discrimination and Jim Crow ruled America. They felt that my generation as the first generation to benefit from the Civil Rights Movement could and should uplift the race through education. My accomplishments were not just for me but for my parents, grandparents, aunts and great-uncles who never had those opportunities.

Marymount Manhattan College opened up a new world to me, helped develop my writing skills and gave me confidence in those writing skills. During this time the then Dean Joan Brookshire said to me that I had a gift for writing. My professors male and female built me up and I felt a sense of accomplishment. So for me returning to college was probably the best decision of my adult life.

Marymount Manhattan College 2002 Graduation photo

SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2016 WEEK 5

On February 1, 2016February 1, 2016 By dancingpalmtreesIn A Better Balance, African American Queen, Eva Gordon Palmer, Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer, FMLA, FMLA Inclusion Act, Gov. Andrew Cuomo, Let Me Call You Sweetheart, Shinnyo-en Buddhism, Sylvester, Uncategorized, Vice President Joe Biden4 Comments

SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2016 WEEK 5

If you had a shelf for your three most special possessions (not including photos, electronic devices and things stored on them, people or animals), what would you put on it?

My Grandmother Eva Palmer’s Musical Sewing Box. It plays “Let Me Call You Sweetheart.” My collection of African-American figurines. Some special edition Collectors plates created by African-American artists.

Grandmother Eva’s Music Sewing Box

Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer — Grandmother Music Sewing Box

If you had a box labelled ‘happiness’, what would you put in it?

Happiness is spending time with my brother Stephen, my cat Sylvester, being outdoors in sunny warm weather, and photography. I don’t think either Stephen or Sylvester would like to be put in a box. On the other hand since Sylvester is a cat maybe he would like being in a box but definitely not Stephen!!

Sylvester in my old Laundry Bag

Sylvester Cat Yoga on the bed

Sylvester Cat Yoga Pose

What do you want more of in your life?

Free time and money!!

Daily Life List: What do you do on an average day? Make a list of your usual activities you do each day.

Since I still work a full-time job I spend Tuesday through Saturday at my workplace.

Working in the security field I spend a lot of time at work since the job entails generous amounts of overtime. So between my commute which is one hour going and another hour returning home, plus 8 to 12 hours spent on the job that’s pretty much the majority of my time. This is why I enjoy my Sunday/Monday weekends and look forward to retiring in Spring 2018.

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

Being invited by Gov. Andrew Cuomo the the Paid Family Leave Rally held last Friday at the McBurney 14th Street YMCA!! It’s not every day that a working class woman like me gets a call from the Governors Office!! Kudos for Gov. Andrew Cuomo for reading the New York Times article done on me and Stephen last year.

Hearing Gov. Cuomo and Vice President Joe Biden speak and endorse Paid Family Leave was an exhilarating experience!! As some of my long-time Followers know I’ve been fighting to get FMLA from my job so I can care for my developmentally disabled brother Stephen. Truly it has been a long and winding road but I owe many Thanks to Congressman Hakeen Jeffries, my legal Team from A Better Balance, Gov. Andrew Cuomo who I have faith will push through and make Paid Family Leave a reality for the citizens of New York and Vice President Joe Biden!!

(7) DeBorah and A Better Balance

Thank you.
http://nyti.ms/1BktTeP

Getting Our Blessing!!

http://www.twcnews.com/nys/capital-region/capital-tonight-interviews/2016/01/29/dina-bakst-012916.html

Looking forward to attending Buddhist Prayer and Meditation Services at Shinnyo-en New York City temple with my Japanese girlfriend. I thank all my Friends whether they be Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu or Buddhist for their unwavering support and encouragement in my efforts to secure FMLA for Stephen.

Quilts

On January 18, 2016March 18, 2017 By dancingpalmtreesIn DeBorah Ann Palmer, Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer, Everyday Use Short story by Alice Walker, Helen Garcia, Helen Palmer Garcia, Quilts, Thelma Palmer Varner, Uncategorized, William J. Palmer, William Junius Palmer, William Palmer12 Comments

https://goo.gl/photos/93pk8FMZcV3ezqss9

Quilts

On the surface the beautiful design, the warmth on a cold winters night while underneath an intricate patchwork of stitches all coming together joining not just pieces of fabric but generations. In my case me granddaughter to my paternal Grandmother Eva Palmer. Grandma Eva died when I was 5 or 6 so I did not get to know her well but that quilt held her memory however faint to me for quite some time. The colorful triangular patches sewn together combining functional with fancy.

Grandma Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer — Grandmother Music Sewing Box

Grandmother Eva’s Music Sewing Box

Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer — Grandmother Music Sewing Box

Grandma Eva’s Musical Sewing Box that plays, “Let Me Call You Sweetheart.”

Her patchwork quilt so lovingly made for me the first child of her only surviving son, my Dad Edward G. Palmer was like an umbilical cord linking us together. Now both my grandmother and my Dad have long since passed on but every time I see quilts I think of Grandma. Some threads represented the sons she lost to Polio other threads her grandchildren representing the next generation. And I possess her quiet strength and strong faith to endure tragedies and celebrate triumphs.

Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer -- Grandmother — Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer — Grandmother

Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer. My Dad’s Mom. She married my Grandfather William Julius Palmer on Jan. 15, 1919. My grandmother was 27 when she got married to my grandfather who was 40. My grandmother was a Milliner, my grandfather a shipping clerk. I have very vague memories of her.

When I read the story Everyday Use by Alice Walker which is supposed to be a riff on the Bible’s Prodigal son I the good girl, the faithful daughter became the prodigal daughter who eventually returned to the fold. Every so often whether permitting I make my pilgrimage to Harlem to walk the streets of the Harlem Renaissance and every day people like William and Eva Palmer raising a family on a shipping clerk’s salary. My Grandfather William Palmer taking the kids to Mt. Morris Park (Now Marcus Garvey Park) on an outing.

My Grandfather William Palmer with four of his children at Mt. Morris Park around 1926. My Dad Edward G. Palmer is not in the photo because he was not born until 1930. The little boy on my GrandDad’s lap later died from polio.

Everyday Use

Short story by Alice Walker

http://xroads.virginia.edu/~ug97/quilt/walker.html

Sometimes I can still remember traveling to Harlem with my Dad to visit my Grandma Eva. In my mind I’m still walking around her large apartment. I see my Aunt Eva’s piano. I see my Dad looking out the window while playing with the window blind cords and then I hear my Grandmother’s voice telling him to stop and for all of us to come eat.

Then memories fade………….

Let Me Call You Sweetheart

On February 17, 2015February 24, 2015 By dancingpalmtreesIn DeBorah Ann Palmer, Edward Gordon Palmer, Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer, Let Me Call You Sweetheart, Mable Elizabeth Palmer, Stephen Vincent Palmer, William Junius Palmer5 Comments

Music Box

I have my Grandmother’s (Eva Palmer) music sewing box that plays “Let Me Call You Sweetheart.” The music box that my Dad brought home after my Grandmother’s funeral. The same music box passed down to me after my Dad died. Where it will go when I’m gone is known only to God since I never married nor had children.

My grandparents were married in 1919 until my grandfather William Palmer died around 1962 or 1963. My grandmother passed away around 1964 or 1965. I was very young so I don’t remember much about her but I Love her musical sewing box and wind up it every so often just to hear that lovely melody. In my mind’s eye I can still see the brownstone in Harlem where they lived. If I think very quietly and carefully I can envision all the rooms and marveling at my perception of largeness and space. Then it fades away to St. Albans, Queens and the house on 115th Road where I grew up. A house that shrank after my parents deaths. Too many memories crowding in on each other so I sold it in 2000.

My parents Edward & Mable Palmer were married for 40 years from 1955 to 1995 when my Dad passed away. My Mom went to join him in 1998.

Marriage was very serious to both my grandparents and parents. It was not a trial run or something to be thrown away or cast aside like we see now. Eva Gordon was my Grandfather’s second wife as his first wife had passed away. There was a big age gap between them as my Grandfather William Palmer was in or near his 40s and I would guess my Grandmother to be maybe 20 or 21 at the time of their marriage.

Grandma Eva's Music Sewing box — Grandma Eva’s Music Sewing box

All of my grandmothers boy children died from polio except my Dad Edward Gordon Palmer. I can’t even begin to imagine giving birth yet not knowing whether or how long your children would live. I guess that’s why people had so many kids in the 1910s, 1920s & 1930s. There were so many diseases and no vaccines that it was a miracle if a child lived beyond toddlerhood.

Grandfather William Palmer with 4 of his children at Mt. Morris Park in 1926. My Dad is not in the photo because he was not born until 1930.

Fast forward to December 1955 when my parents Edward and Mable Palmer married. I was born first then my brother Stephen came along in May 1961. By 1963 Stephen was age two and had not spoken a word. Doctors back then labeled Stephen “emotionally disturbed” and advised my parents to put him away in an institution. My parents Did Not take the doctors advice but took their son back home, loved him, raised him and taught him as much as they could. For those of you who remember the horrors of Willowbrook you know why my parents could never do that to Stephen. Today Stephen works and has an active social life.

I say all this about my family history to point out that marriage is no Garden Party. You take the good and the bad the better and the worse and yes in sickness and in health. Love is not all the sappy romances we read about in books or see on TV or in the movies. Love is the real world. Real Life. Where there are no guarantees but many unseen rewards.