My Crowning Glory


These are some of the products I used for my Crowning Glory, my Mane, to remain forever Afro-Delicious!!  Most of the Essential Oils I use on my hair can also be used on skin. African hair tends to be dry and if you live in a cold climate like New York the cold, wind, ice, sleet and snow can cause your hair to break.  Going from the extremes of ones heated home out into the freezing weather can damage ones tresses.  Wool hats are a no-no for Black hair as they wear away the edges and can pull our hair out. If you must wear a wool hat or any winter hat use a scarf or plastic conditioning cap to protect your hairline.  Also moisturize your hair at night by applying the oils, putting on a plastic conditioning cap which can be purchased in beauty supply stores or drug store, a silk wrap sleep cap or a scarf. When you wake up in the morning either wash or rinse out the excess oils.

Menopause can affect your hair adversely. It’s great that you no longer have a period but that hormone Estrogen is one of the things that keeps the hair strong, glossy and growing. When I was young meaning prior to Menopause I had thick dense hair now my hair is still somewhat thick but not as dense. That’s why I must pay extra attention to my hair now that I’m older.

Like men many of my women friends have complained of breakage and thinning hair. You can combat this through keeping the hair moisturized and avoiding chemical perms, too tight braids, weaves and any styles that puts tension on the hair. I choose to wear my hair natural and only wear braids if I’m going to a function or for a special occasion. Most times it’s just easier for me to go to my barber and get my hair trimmed to get rid of the split ends which will also damage your hair.

Sometimes I do blow dry my hair because as it grows it tends to get tangled. I use blow dryer and a Denman hair brush or a wide tooth comb as I have a tight curl pattern of many small tight spirals.  The hair in the front and top of my head is not the same texture as the hair on the back of my head. The hair on the top and front is a looser curl pattern.

I watch a lot of Black Hair Care videos on YouTube. Black Women have a variety of hair types and textures. Black people are probably the most varied people on earth. We are a grand mosaic.

I also enjoy watching the hair care videos from Ladies in India not that I’m every gonna have their type hair but Indian Women use natural products that keep their hair healthy and strong. Despite the race and hair texture there is always something to learn.

Here are some of my healthy hair products.





Obsidian Ebony Sioux Blackfoot Visions with a Dollop of Cream

Black in America ~ Kujichagulia — SelfDetermination

Obsidian Ebony Sioux Blackfoot Visions


Stephen and I in December 1961.
Stephen and I in December 1961.

My family ranges from pale white with blue eyes to Darkest Black. However I really had no idea of my Rainbow family until Aunts passed away and then when my father died in 1995.  Then I was confronted with somebody who had white skin and blue eyes saying that they were my cousins.  I always knew my Paternal Grandfather had been married twice but it was then that I realized his first wife must have been white.  That was probably the real reason he left Petersburg, VA and moved to New York during the early 1900s…
As a child during the 1960s, I remember being called Tar Baby.  I remember my mother who was light-skinned but who suffered under Jim Crow in Dayton, Ohio saying, “If You’re white you’re alright. If your Brown stick around. If you’re Black Get Back!”  Every day on the playground of a Black school Black kids would taunt me. Tar Baby! African! Monkey!  I came home crying every day.  My Dad who was Dark-Skinned always told me, “The Blacker the Berry the Sweeter the Juice. If the berry’s too light it has no use.”  That would give me comfort.

Defiant DeBorah
Defiant precocious DeBorah

However it took decades before I was comfortable in my Black skin.   But the pigeon holing by the Black Community, My Community was very evident in the 60s and 70s when I was coming of age.  I don’t have what many Black people define as African features. Whatever that means.  From a child even until now Black people, white people and other Peoples of Color will ask me if I’m part Native American. The answer to that question is Yes but if they looked closely at the African continent they’d find Black people with all manner of varied facial features. But nobody does. They just assume.

High School Graduation 1977

My Speech. My Dad taught me to speak what he called “The King’s English.”  Slang was not allowed in our home.  As a result Black people say I sound like I’m white or that I speak proper.  Excuse me but aren’t we all supposed to speak English instead of Ebonics?!  White people say I’m very articulate (unsaid ~ “for a Black person)  It’s a No Win situation.

First Dance with My Father
First Dance with My Father

The kinky nappy hair did not help. I was called Brillo pad. There was the evil straightening comb with Dixie Peach and Ultra Sheen (hair grease). My Mom telling me to bend my head so she could get to my “Kitchen.”  My hair was so thick, teeth broke out of combs my mother attempted on my Kinapps.  Then came 1972 when my Dad decided that I was going to get an Afro. Watu Wasuri Use Afro Sheen.  Then I was Beautiful.  Angela Davis Black Panther Party Soul Train Beautiful.  In the 80s I surrendered to Jheri Curl Juice.  Since then I’ve been pig-tailed, relaxed, braided, loc’ed and now with my not so thick Menopausal hair I’ve returned home to my Afro. Not as Fierce. Somewhat wiry and thanks to L’Oreal always colored various shades of red.

The new stigma for me now, Ageism. Being a Black Woman over 50 who thanks to that once hated Dark Skin now is grateful because Black Don’t Crack!


Me in 1961
1961- A Very Good Year
Me at around age five or six
Little Me
African/Native American Queen
MMC 2002 Graduation
Victory Salute at Seven Bell Fitness Gym
Victory Salute at Seven Bell Fitness Gym