Welcome to Women’s History month or as I call it Black HerStory Month
My passion is to tell the oft forgotten stories of Black Women. Like the two Black Women named in the New York Times article I am a Survivor of sexual assault while I served my country. Art is helping me pull my life together and be Victorious not a victim. The Voices of Black Women Will Be Heard! Through our Art, Song, Dance, & Writing!
Sp4 DeBorah Ann Palmer, U.S. Army ~~ November 1977 to November 1981, 569th PSC & 101st Airborne Division!
I had hoped to write a happy post. Something positive and uplifting for this Veteran’s Day but unfortunately with the results of yesterday’s presidential election there is not much good that can be said.
Those of you who served in the United States Army remember this Oath of Enlistment.
I, _____, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God.” (Title 10, US Code; Act of 5 May 1960 replacing the wording first adopted in 1789, with amendment effective 5 October 1962).
Forty years ago I raised my right hand and recited this Oath.
What happens when that enemy is not only domestic but has now become the Commander in Chief aka President of the United States of America. A man who is a well known sociopath and narcissist. A man whose evil rhetoric and divisive tactics split the nation into two camps. A man who if we allow him will bring if not World War Three but a Civil War where we will be maimed, lose property, jobs, life and limb.
I have to admit being that I work for a museum which mainly attracts the 1%, the wealthy, rich upper-crust of society who don’t give a damn about the working class, immigrants, Black Americans or any peoples of Color I went through my workday numb with interspersion of break times where colleagues sat in equally numb silence or made half-halfhearted attempts to console each other. A Filipina co-worker and I just hugged.
I especially look to my Jewish co-worker who is the voice of reason in all situations. We highly value and respect his opinion. He did give me some hope as did one of my Caribbean co-workers that maybe the Trump Nightmare this man eating bone crunching terminator machine will not completely destroy America as we know it.
As I watch the tourists, visitors and people who live in the white-bread world surrounding neighborhood laugh, joke, play with their kids, be happy I realize that they could be happy because Trump becoming president will not touch their world and in fact will probably make life better for them.
Most of the low echelon workers security and custodial are populated by immigrants, Muslims, people of Color, Hindus, you know the folks that Middle America, Republican Conservative America loves to hate, blame and make us scapegoats for all that is wrong with this country. We are the ones who secure, clean and console but are taken for granted.
We gather together hanging onto any words of hope or solace in this one of the saddest most depressing events in recent U.S. history. Huddling closer and closer attempting to create some type of safety net. But inside is that little voice of fear. We may not show it because we can’t after all we are not supposed to have any feelings or emotions only be subservient to the ruling majority. You know that Remains of the Day stiff upper lip type of thing.
For me the most heart wrenching thing as a U.S. Army Veteran is that the deed is done and there is little or nothing I can do to turn things around.
I fear another Middle Passage. The return of Slavery and Jim Crow. Or perhaps it never really left and was only waiting in the wings for the right actor to make an appearance on stage for it’s horrible reanimation. I Fear: Another Trail of Tears. Another Nazi Germany. Internment camps like the ones where Japanese-Americans were forced into during WWII. More police shootings or innocent Black people.
It also troubles me that many who voted for Trump live in the so-called Bible Belt. Well what Bible are you reading. You do know that Jesus was a Jew who live in a multi-cultural polytheistic society and no where in the Gospels where he is attacking his Greek, Roman or Egyptian neighbors or devaluing their belief systems. In fact Jesus saved most of his most scathing remarks for his fellow Jews/Hebrews specifically the Pharisees and Sadducees. Here is where Jesus got angry with hypocrites.
New International Version (NIV)
Jesus at the Temple
12 Jesus entered the temple courts and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves.13 “It is written,” he said to them,“‘My house will be called a house of prayer,’but you are making it ‘a den of robbers.
Those who voted for Trump who is more of an Anti-Christ than a Christian have filled Presidency with a Thief!!
I am stunned, appalled and scared to death of this upcoming Trump Presidency. The KKK is going to be in the White House as of January 2017. I’m old enough to remember the Civil Rights Movement of the 1960s. Folks this is real and is no joke.
The Healthcare law will be repealed, Civil Rights laws be dismantled. Every Black, brown, Jewish, Asian, Muslim, Native Americans, Hindu, Buddhist, all immigrants should be afraid. After all a year from now none of us may be here. My brother Stephen has Autism. There goes all the goods, services and programs for Disabled Americans.
We are going backwards to the 18th and 19th slavery Jim Crow days. My ancestors are weeping. I’m terrified!!
President Trump will keep his promise to Make America White again.
But after all the “Others” are gone what will America do then??? This man has sold you a bill of goods. He gave you poisoned Kool-Aid and you drank. Remember every decision, every choice has consequences. I hope that you can live with yours.
Yesterday I received my Marymount Manhattan College 2017 Reunion Weekend reminder invitation for the Class of 2002! 🙂 Can’t believe 15 years have passed so quickly since my graduation!! Wow!! Time is really moving at a fast pace!!
The Following is an email form my brother Stephen. This really made my day and brought me tears of Joy as I’ve had a particularly horrendous work week. No sooner than I get back to work from my Lovely vacation than a co-worker who has it in for me is filing accusations against me and 3 other co-workers charging us with harassment and physically pushing her. Of course it’s not true but my workplace which is already horrible is about to get 1000 times worse. Job = Hell + Dante’s Inferno. But again there is nothing I can do. Because this person’s life is all screwed up she is doing her best to make the rest of us miserable.
Stephen’s words gave me the pick me up and happiness I need to go on in Life. At least I know Stephen Loves me if nobody else does. My brother Stephen is such an Amazing Autism Guy!!
Stephen’s Awesome Email Message!!!
“Hi sister how are you doing today . I had a good day at program today , I draw and colored with my peers, I also helped with the paper work in the class room . After i went to lunch, it was good i really enjoyed lunch time with my friends. I wanted to know if you still have the drawing of the picture i made.”
Sent my reply to Stephen right away and perhaps when he returns to program I will receive an answer sometime next week. I have no idea what picture Stephen is talking about but I asked him to make several more pictures for me and I will add them to our ongoing photo/picture collage project.
Real Life Reality Check
As for the Stephen’s clothing situation which I discussed in previous emails I spoke with the Director of his Group Home Residence while I was on vacation. He said he would email me an inventory of all Stephen’s belongings. Well a week has passed since I returned to work from my vacation and no inventory. Since I don’t drive and can’t afford a cab or taxi to get over there I suppose I will never find out what exactly is going on.
I did contact other agencies that are supposed to oversee and/or monitor group homes but they told me that there was nothing they could do and had no wish to become involved in our case. I’m not supposed to make or take personal calls on my job plus I think my phone is about to be cut-off because I don’t have money to pay the bill.
Before T-Mobile disconnects me I must get in touch with the Veteran’s Administration. The V.A. did call me back this past week but by the time I get home they are closed. I also received some type of VA health care card in the mail so I guess that’s a form of progress. Next goal is to set up an appointment with the local V.A. health care facility to see if they can help me with my medical problems.
I suppose this is one of those Life’s Lessons where one has to admit defeat. I finally had to admit to myself I can no longer fulfill many of my responsibilities. It’s physically impossible for me to hold down a full-time job which requires me to work very long hours, keep up with what’s going on in Stephen’s Residence plus attempt to take care of myself.
I’m not a machine with replaceable parts or a robot who can just plow through obstacles. I’m a human being whose body has begun to betray me. The aging process is no joke!
In the back of my mind I knew I was failing but did not want to admit it. As humans we Love to Lie to Ourselves that we are powerful, strong, capable and ready to take on any challenge. Well that’s not always the case. When I was younger, with a flexible well paying job and in better health yeah I could do whatever I set my mind to. Recently over these past few months reality slapped me upside my head and reminded me of all my numerous failures. However I know in my heart, soul and mind I did the best I could but sometimes one’s best is not good enough.
Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose. Lots of times Life Sucks. This is one of those times.