Stay in your Lane

Recently I saw this Meme on Instagram.

A Private Life is a Happy Life

Usually I disregard most Memes as they are ridiculous, stupid and ignorant but this one resonated with me.

Over time I’ve been blogging less and less. Sharing less and less despite the cries of people who say my story matters.

In fact I deleted one of my blogs and have begun to delete many of my older posts. Contemplated deleting this blog also but it’s attached to my photography blog Roaming Urban Gypsy so it stays.

There are certain specific issues that I do discuss such as Austim in the hopes that my activism and advocacy will help other families who have developmentally disabled family members.

Of course Veterans since I am one and the ever present racism, bigotry and discrimination because well as a Black Woman in America that’s an every day experience.

However as far as my personal affairs especially concerning relationships, health, medical issues I’ve learned over time my parents expression, Don’t put your business in the street.

When you discuss your personal experiences online you open yourself up to ridicule, scorn and unwanted pity. People are not really empathetic and get off on reading about other people’s troubles so they can I’m better than so and so.

Of course everyone is different. Some people feel that being an open book is cathartic. For me sharing often makes me feel worse not better.

After a falling out with a friend I’ve known for over 35 years I realized that by telling someone I thought I knew, I only set myself up for judgment. As a result I play Public Face/Private Face. Much of the time I say what certain people want or expect to hear because they can’t handle truth. They live in a Disneyfied Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm world and reject any voice that doesn’t correspond to their expectations. Sometimes I will say stuff just to get people out of my face.

I maintain my Silence. For in the past I’ve had many regrets.

Now save for my creative endeavors the best parts of my life are not on social media. In fact I periodically disconnect from social Media. Once I retired last month August I vowed to live in the moment as much as possible. When certain specific folks that I highly respect asked me to share some of my poetic thoughts, photographs and creative moments I was happy to comply.

I still participate in many photography challenges because I enjoy them and I Love sharing, highlighting and showcasing New York city, my hometown.

Be Invisible.

Maintain your Mystery.


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