First FORGIVENESS Friday of 2019

First FORGIVENESS Friday of 2019

I’m writing this Blog Post inspired by Debbie Roth of Forgiving Fridays. Her Blog Posts cause me to think about my words and actions.

It’s the Last Forgiving Fridays of 2018! Today’s topic is Gratitude and Forgiveness

I’m also including a Podcast featuring Bishop TD Jakes. Bishop Jakes made this for 2018 but it’s a lesson for every year. For some Strange reason the videos visuals don’t go with the teaching sermon but just listen as though it was a Podcast.

The Power of Life and death is in the tongue. Proverbs 18:21

Growing up my parents used to tell me, Don’t put your Business out in the Street.

Nowadays the Street not only includes folks who like to gossip, lie, act a fool, Showboating or what Millennials call Flossing and Carry tales but those who feel the need to share all their personal and private information on Facebook, Twitter and Blogs. Then wonder why nothing is working out in their lives or worse yet the consequences of running the mouth has come back to bite them in the ass.

End diarrhea of the Mouth!


If you say or do something wrong be an Adult, go back and Apologize.

When I was in the United States Army back in the late 1970s we had to answer the phone, 569th Personnel Service Company. This Line is Not Secure.

Silence is Golden.

Especially when the temptation to react and say something that you will regret is at the tip of your tongue.

You don’t have to attend every fight to which you are invited.

I retired in August 2018. During the ten years that I was at that job many things happened both good and bad. There were some extremely difficult times but I knew that when I left I had to leave all the ugliness and nastiness behind. Pain, loss, sorrow and anxiety prepared me. Sometimes you must go through. There’s a Blessing in the Lesson. Not that I want to repeat the last ten years but I’m definitely more appreciative and grateful having come through the Fire.

Some of my former colleagues wanted me to return for an Exit Interview specifically to badmouth the Junior managers who had caused me harm. I declined. I spoke up for a staff person who was being bullied via emails to the appropriate person but as for myself my time in Purgatory was over.

You can’t move onto the next Phase of your Life if you are stuck in the Past.

To quote Author L.P. Hartley, The Past is a Foreign Country; they do things differently there.

God honored my Silence. By the end of September I learned that the building I was working in would be leased to another Museum. Therefore only the Union staff will be absorbed by the Main building. The Nonunion employees including the evil Junior managers better start looking for New jobs. No. I’m not rejoicing that anyone loses their jobs but to quote another one of my parents sayings, God don’t like Ugly.

Shortly after that my housemate and I were having a meal at the Daily Press coffee shop and we had a pleasant conversation with the Founders of A Creator’s Collection.

My Season had arrived. If you follow my Photography Blog Roaming Urban Gypsy you’re aware of all the Art Shows I’ve been in since then. My artwork has also been on display at The Shinnyo-en Meditation Center.

One cannot forget the past but you can control how it affects you. I’ve also learned to be very cautious and selective about what I share Online. There’s absolutely No Reason to write about or complain about my health issues or finances. By doing that you give People ammunition to manipulate you. Abuse you and make a Fool of you.

Only discuss those challenges with your spouse if you are married, a trusted family member, doctor, dentist or your minister or Pastor. Whining, moaning and groaning accomplishes absolutely Nothing.

As my girlfriend says, Handle Your Business!

Does this mean that we don’t have compassion for others who are going through? Of course Not! Every one Needs a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on. This was illustrated in a previous Blog Post, Pause for Thoughts where a chance meeting in the local laundromat gave me an opportunity to be there for a Mother whose 15 year old Son has Autism. God put me in the right place at the right time because the Lord knew out of all the People washing clothes that day I would understand Her pain and frustration because I’ve been there.

We Need More Compassion and Loving kindness in this World.

It’s the Last Forgiving Fridays of 2018! Today’s topic is Gratitude and Forgiveness

As my Dad Edward Palmer used to say, To Know Better is to Do Better.

Union Art Show ~~ March 11th 2018



Museum Union Art Workers

60 Years of Solidarity

Union Art Show ~~ March 11th 2018

El Barrio’s Artspace PS 109

215 East 99th Street

New York, NY 10029

Gallery Hours: Tuesday ~~ Saturday 12pm ~~ 6pm

Closes March 21st


I came. I saw. I mingled. I Laughed. I joked. I saw old friends. I snacked. I enjoyed.


A Great Time was had by all.












Can’t Touch This

Can’t Touch This


At the end of this blog post is a true life incident that happened to me earlier today.  Another #MeToo incident.  May contain triggers but it will also explain why I keep my distance from people and I don’t trust anyone.

My Theme song for the outstretched arms people who besieged Loners and Solitary both Left and Right

Feel the need to envelop you in folds of sweaty germ laden flesh. Suffocating you in the name or dimensions of comfort. Theirs not yours.

Smiling Bitch Face

She Likened them to the demands of strange men who expect Kewpie Barbie Stepford Wives fake painted on smiles

Well brother She bequeath to you and all smile obessed males…..Resting Bitch Face.

Works well on a subway, bus or street near you.

Resting Bitch Face

She projectile vomit your antiquarian views across the floor.

Got my Mind Right No dumbing down for your pitiful expectations.

In the meantime go rent yourself a plastic sex doll with the gaping maw that won’t quit. Heard that there’s a Twilight version made just for you complete with razor sharp canines.


True Experience

Reasons why I don’t trust people, ask for help and why I remain cynical and jaded.

Via is a car service similar to Lyft and Uber

The Via driver kept asking me for my phone number because he wanted to date me.  I’m 59. He is 37.  Plus you are not supposed to be propositioning your riders.  The entire conversation was wrong but when you are a woman alone in a car with a man you learn to placate them because Men can be and are violent.  Plus I just wanted to get home in one piece.

I decided to report the Via driver. He was unprofessional. I also asked for a refund. You’d think in this age of #MeToo men would stop their bad behavior but nothing stops males. It’s like they are on a mission to conquer women or add them as a notch on their belt.

I began taking car services for safety and health reasons. It has become very difficult for me to climb up and down subway stairs. However at this point I may as well take my chances of tripping and falling on the subway steps as opposed to crazy Via drivers asking me for a date.

Women aren’t safe anywhere in America or at any time. No matter what precautions we take it always backfires. At least for me anyway.


Via gave me a $10 credit. I won’t use it. They can keep their credit. Thinking of deleting the App on my phone. Why is it that when Ladies take precautions for safety that it backfires? There needs to be a car service run by and only for women. Maybe that would be better.

Guys you give yourselves bad reputations. Mothers Please teach your sons better because women can be just as much at fault as men. Where do guys get these stupid ideas that it’s okay to see women as sex objects? It can just be from male relatives. A lot of this mess comes from their Mothers!

Via refunded my money! Hooray! I’m happy for that but sad that men still proposition Women for dates aka sex. At my age I don’t give out my number to some guy I don’t know. I’m neither desperate or “dick crazy.” Plus at nearly age 60 I’m too old for nonsense!

I’m looking forward to retirement.





The New Paradigm

Every day that the weather is clear and good I will be at work. Only making an exception for a very close friend’s Birthday Celebration September 23rd and Of course for spending time with Stephen on Halloween.

It is more than clearing up debts and bills it is vital to just basic survival. My room-mate spoke with the Landlord and our rent will not go up for 2017 but wait until 2018 then a big increase. The transit fares go up, food costs go up therefore I cannot deviate from the plan. Unless you are part of the rich, wealthy elite this is the new life style. I must and will follow the plan until I can retire.

Laziness and taking time off equals poverty.  She/he who does not work shall not eat. Many of my immigrant co-workers work Seven Yes 7 days a week otherwise you cannot afford to live in New York City. Now if I had a job making even $60,000 per year sure I could live a life of leisure but until my income increases I will be doing the six day thing for several months.  I feel like a drone worker bee robot who is an ATM for bill collectors.

Like the Born I’ve been assimilated into the collective.

Me and the Borg in my old office job
Me and the Borg at my old office job where I made more money and had a better life.


Get in Where you Fit in


Get in Where you Fit in………

A favorite expression of one of my co-workers who is in his 60s.  His saying came to mind as I was reading a Facebook post from a different co-worker who complains a lot about our job. We are all Museum Guards.  Admittedly nobody goes to College to become a low paid Museum Guard but like many Baby Boomers who were laid off in the financial crisis and recession of 2006, 2007, 2008……  We learned the hard way that most employers do not hire people over 50.  That is just the way it is. A difficult reality.

In our past lives we all had well paying fulfilling jobs but when you are faced with not being able to pay your bills or more importantly your rent you have to take what is available. Security is the one field that will hire over 50 people.  Even though I went for other jobs both inside and outside the museum where I felt my skills would be put to good use once again even with me being a Veteran, a College graduate and having years of experience nobody will promote or hire somebody whose work history dates back to the 1970s.  We 50+ folks are considered dinosaurs.

I understand my co-workers frustration because he is a talented illustrator but in order to survive in America often you must put aside your expectations and deal with current events. Do you want to eat?  Or starve?  Do you want to be evicted? Do you want your phone and utilities cut off?  Your answer is probably No. Therefore you must do jobs that you are overqualified for and other little or no mental stimulation.

When I first started working at the museum I was frustrated, angry and I felt I deserved better.  I felt I was owed something. Reality check. Life owes you nothing.  My past achievements mean nothing. Whatever experience, knowledge or wisdom you have to share is not valued in a society that is mesmerized by youth, gadgets, devices, & apps.

You’ve seen those headlines in major financial publications that run articles like 40 under 40 or 30 under 30.  You get the message.

And as my Aunts used to say, We are not spring chickens.  Silicon Valley/Alley is not looking for folks in my age group. Then again I’m not looking for them either.

I am grateful that I had good jobs back in 1980s, 1990s & early 2000s. I’m glad I served my country in the military. Yes of course it would be nice if I had a better job where I could make a greater contribution but like I said before or better yet look at the media, TV, Movies, Internet, etc…..   When was the last time you saw an actress over 40 in a leading romantic role or better yet one over 50. Rarely.  Made my point.  If the hiring manager or H.R. person is young enough to be your child you can be eloquent and erudite all you want but as soon as you leave the office your resume will go in the trash. This assuming you get an interview at all.

Once I made peace with my lot in life. Let go of my false expectations and concentrated on what I can get out of this job in terms of benefits, pension and healthcare my life became easier. The anger and frustration dissipated.  As I’ve learned from Buddhist teachings desire is a source of unhappiness.

My heart is with my gifted illustrator co-worker because I was once in his shoes. He is a nice guy and I know he is doing the best he can for himself and his wife.

After having gone through years of tears I can appreciate my Get in Where you Fit in approach to life. I also admire him because as many of us who are in our 50s & 60s know middle-aged often brings sickness, disease, illness and injury.  We have in common that our bodies are breaking down.  Physically we are not the same as we were during our 20s & 30s. Pills become a daily regimen and we see more of our various health care practitioners than we do our own families.  Yet Thankfully our minds are still strong and sharp.  Even though the workforce does not want or need us we can direct our skills, talents, gifts and abilities in other directions.

It is good to vent but continued ranting and raving will only increase your sadness and frustration. And eventually it will only add to your current health and medical woes. Let. It. Go.

Peace is Acceptance and Adjustment to what life throws at you or takes away.