Share Your World – July 10, 2017


 

Share Your World – July 10, 2017

Share Your World – July 10, 2017

share-your-world-syw

How do you like to spend a rainy day?

Inside. Rain is bad for my arthritis. Creates more pain. If it rains on a work day or if I have a meeting to attend then I just grin and bare the pain and pass out when I get home. Joint pain is no fun so rain is not my friend.

List at least five favorite treats. (They do not have to be sugary).

Plantain chips

Blueberry muffins

Egg and American cheese on a cinnamon raisin bagel

Italian ices

Yogurt

Where’s your favorite place to take out-of-town guests?

I never have out of town guests but I remember when I was a young girl and my family from Ohio came to New York either my Dad or myself would take them to the famous New York sites. Empire State building and all those touristy places I don’t like. I suppose if someone were to visit me and I had the vacation time to spend with them we’d be going to all the New York Museums which I can get in for Free since I am employed by a NY Museum.

You are trapped in an elevator, who would you want to be trapped with?

That’s something I don’t even want to entertain since it has happened on my job. Not to me but to my co-workers. I have a fear of enclosed places with no escape which is bad because one of my duties when there is a special exhibition opening is to operate the elevator. I know my bosses can see me pacing back and forth inside the elevator. Scary. Ugh. This scenario is a Trigger for my nerves. Reminds me of when I was trapped underground in the subway for over an hour last Jan when the train hit a guy on the tracks. Suicide victim. Horrible.

Given that I have high blood pressure, anxiety and panic attacks I’d pick Jesus because only Jesus could get the elevators to work or take me to Heaven in case I have a heart attack or stroke.

Optional Bonus question:  What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

I got to see Stephen. I had planned for a relaxing three 3 day weekend but that did not happen.  The only good part was attending Stephen’s meeting and seeing him. The news about all the layoffs and cutbacks due to lack of funding was depressing. Less and less services and programs for Stephen and the other residents.

The art program has been completely cut.  Stephen enjoys art and making drawings, ceramics, etc….  He is no longer going out to as many work-sites because New York State has not provided funding to pay staff to take him to his job sites.  Stephen used to attend a special camp for Adults with Autism but that got cut also. So you see my 3 days off was not relaxing in the least bit.

Developmentally Disabled citizens are being kicked to the curb because our American government no longer cares. Many professionals and family members are worried that this is a return to the warehousing of developmentally disabled people that was the norm in the 50s, 60s & 70s.  Those of you old enough will remember Willowbrook and the scandal that reporter Geraldo Rivero exposed at that house of horrors.

I wish I was rich and wealthy so I could donate money to hire more staff and return the arts, camps, work-site/work readiness programs that make the lives those with developmental disabilities fulfilling.

 

 

Secrets of a Decaying Socialite


 

Secrets of a Decaying Socialite

Broken is who and what I am. Every day I see the pieces of my armor falling to the floor. I am that tragic secret whispered among the thorns. An embalmed mannequin morphing into a rotting corpse.  A piece of trash waiting for Sanitation to pick me up and deposit me on the refuse heap. The Reaper comes for his Harvest as the Char Man makes his daily delivery to Sanford & Son. Elizabeth I’ll see you soon.


Homicide

When did the explosion happen? Who knows? Because I think it was really an implosion. Being a Nightmare waiting to be born. Somebody put a  dent in my universe which I don’t know how to repair.

Save your prayers. Save Your Prayers for stones on the ground. Each prayer causes me to die a little each second of every day.  Wash away the guilt and shame so embedded that you need to kill parts of your brain to live.  

Documenta Dementia.

Let me go back to the nobody I’ve always been. One with nothing to prove.

I am not mortar and stone.  I am bubbling flesh bursting at the seams. In my dreams I’m someone else. Somebody else. An important person. A person with a mission, passion and purpose. Going up in the air ready to crash into the next mountain peak. Brought low. Brought back to earth. Reality.

Birthing a mummified child. Dear Dead One How long were you within me? He just kept stabbing at my web of lies whilst becoming entangled within its sticky threads. Pain Follows even to the most secret hiding places.

Thank you and please enjoy my Triggers.