Let Me Call You Sweetheart

On February 17, 2015February 24, 2015 By dancingpalmtreesIn DeBorah Ann Palmer, Edward Gordon Palmer, Eva Sophronia Gordon Palmer, Let Me Call You Sweetheart, Mable Elizabeth Palmer, Stephen Vincent Palmer, William Junius Palmer5 Comments

Music Box

I have my Grandmother’s (Eva Palmer) music sewing box that plays “Let Me Call You Sweetheart.” The music box that my Dad brought home after my Grandmother’s funeral. The same music box passed down to me after my Dad died. Where it will go when I’m gone is known only to God since I never married nor had children.

My grandparents were married in 1919 until my grandfather William Palmer died around 1962 or 1963. My grandmother passed away around 1964 or 1965. I was very young so I don’t remember much about her but I Love her musical sewing box and wind up it every so often just to hear that lovely melody. In my mind’s eye I can still see the brownstone in Harlem where they lived. If I think very quietly and carefully I can envision all the rooms and marveling at my perception of largeness and space. Then it fades away to St. Albans, Queens and the house on 115th Road where I grew up. A house that shrank after my parents deaths. Too many memories crowding in on each other so I sold it in 2000.

My parents Edward & Mable Palmer were married for 40 years from 1955 to 1995 when my Dad passed away. My Mom went to join him in 1998.

Marriage was very serious to both my grandparents and parents. It was not a trial run or something to be thrown away or cast aside like we see now. Eva Gordon was my Grandfather’s second wife as his first wife had passed away. There was a big age gap between them as my Grandfather William Palmer was in or near his 40s and I would guess my Grandmother to be maybe 20 or 21 at the time of their marriage.

Grandma Eva's Music Sewing box — Grandma Eva’s Music Sewing box

All of my grandmothers boy children died from polio except my Dad Edward Gordon Palmer. I can’t even begin to imagine giving birth yet not knowing whether or how long your children would live. I guess that’s why people had so many kids in the 1910s, 1920s & 1930s. There were so many diseases and no vaccines that it was a miracle if a child lived beyond toddlerhood.

Grandfather William Palmer with 4 of his children at Mt. Morris Park in 1926. My Dad is not in the photo because he was not born until 1930.

Fast forward to December 1955 when my parents Edward and Mable Palmer married. I was born first then my brother Stephen came along in May 1961. By 1963 Stephen was age two and had not spoken a word. Doctors back then labeled Stephen “emotionally disturbed” and advised my parents to put him away in an institution. My parents Did Not take the doctors advice but took their son back home, loved him, raised him and taught him as much as they could. For those of you who remember the horrors of Willowbrook you know why my parents could never do that to Stephen. Today Stephen works and has an active social life.

I say all this about my family history to point out that marriage is no Garden Party. You take the good and the bad the better and the worse and yes in sickness and in health. Love is not all the sappy romances we read about in books or see on TV or in the movies. Love is the real world. Real Life. Where there are no guarantees but many unseen rewards.

When I hear this melody as sung by The Mills Brothers I envision them all dancing in Heaven.

http://youtu.be/0ma8t2m2FQ8

Color Him Father. Color Him Love.

On June 15, 2014February 16, 2015 By dancingpalmtreesIn Daddy, Edward Palmer, Father's Day, Lyrical Family Memories, Mable Elizabeth Palmer, Mable Palmer, Stephen Vincent Palmer2 Comments

Memories of Daddy

HAPPY 85TH BIRTHDAY IN HEAVEN DADDY!! Feb 11, 1930 to May 13,1995. WE LOVE AND MISS YOU ALWAYS. DEBORAH AND STEPHEN

Edward G. Palmer Korean War — Edward G. Palmer
Korean War

Proverbs 13:22 English Standard Version (ESV) 22 A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children…….

My Dad was that Good Man. He fought the good fight of faith. Daddy persevered during his short stay on this earth always putting his family first and taking joy in our accomplishments. An inheritance is more than money, more than genetics or DNA. Our Dad left us an Inheritance of morals, values, good character, faith in ourselves, love and concern for our fellow humans and animals. Yes, speaking for my brother as well as myself, Stephen and I are truly proud to be our Dad’s Legacy into this world. Edward G. Palmer ~ Feb. 11, 1930 – May 13, 1995.

Stephen, Me & Daddy at my 1977 High School graduation.

Edward G. Palmer was everything that his name Edward embodies: Edward is an English given name. It is derived from Old English words ead (meaning ‘wealth’, ‘fortune’ or ‘prosperous’) and weard (meaning ‘guardian’ or ‘protector’).

My Dad Believed in us!! And today my brother Stephen and I are all the better for Daddy’s faith in his children!

Tears of sadness for I will never on this earth Dance with my Father again. Daddy our next dance is in Heaven.

http://youtu.be/J_mzw2MdIFY

Our Dad was the Guardian, Protector and Provider for our family. A Loving Husband and Father. Dad’s middle name was Gordon which means “Beloved”. Truly he was a Beloved Father always looking out for his family.

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY IN HEAVEN DADDY. LOVE, DeBorah and Stephen.

Optical Illusions

On March 31, 2014March 31, 2014 By dancingpalmtreesIn Autism, Back Alleys, Better Homes & Gardens, Broken Angels, cacophony, Catharsis, Damaged Goods, DeBorah, Depression, Developmental Disabilities, Diabetes, Disability, Dissonance, Edward Palmer, Fallen Angels, House Beautiful, Images, Inner-City, Inscriptions, John 21:18, Kinky/Nappy Hair, Koyaanisqatsi, Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous, Lyrical Family Memories, Mable Elizabeth Palmer, Mable Palmer, Optical illusions, profane, Rheingold, Sacred, Scars, Schaefer, soul, Stephen Vincent Palmer, Stigmata, Tattoos, Under belly, Unloved, Unwanted1 Comment

When I was a little girl during the 1960s my mother had a love affair with Better Homes & Gardens and House Beautiful magazines. However try as she might and my Mom was an excellent decorator (I believe she missed her calling) with two kids, a husband who smoked and various dogs our house was never as clean or as orderly as those pictured in the magazines. Periodically my 4’11” 95 lb mother would move those big heavy 1950s furniture from one end of the living room to the next causing my father great consternation when he tripped over tables or chairs that seemed to magically appear usually around Midnight when he got home from his late shift.

Though the houses and rooms were beautiful, they were only beautiful in an anti-septic, unlived in way. Pure white living rooms untouched by jumping muddy dogs, kids with drippy Popsicles, or cans of Rheingold and Schaefer beer cans making little rings on the end tables.

Everything is arranged, after all those pictures are photo shoots put together for maximum impact to the readers. Kitchens where nary a fried chicken or pork chop popped grease or soup boiled over. No cans of Crisco sitting on the counter-top. No spilled glasses of Kool-Aid, Orange Crush, Coca-Cola or Pepsi.

No smells of fish and chittlin’s being cleaned or bugs flying in from the holes in the ratty screens we put in the windows during the summer because we had no air conditioning. The pop and sizzle of the steel straightening comb being pulled through my Ultra Sheen saturated nappy kinky hair on a Saturday night in preparation for Sunday school in the morning.

Too perfect and we all know that life is not perfect. I like furniture to have character. Those little cracks, dents and chips give an openness and appeal that utter perfection cannot rival.

My family’s lives were not perfect. We were and are real people with real lives. Nothing is staged. My mother was a functioning schizophrenic alcoholic, my Dad was in a job that he found not fulfilling, my brother was born with Autism, I’ve battled depression since my teen years. No there are no picture perfect lives here. But now I’m no longer afraid or ashamed of my battle scars. I wear them proudly. I’ll take the nitty-gritty, those who society has deemed damaged goods, the unloved, the unwanted, the back alleys and the under belly of the business district at night, inner-city over Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous any day. I’m Blessed to be a Broken Angel.

As for disability Jesus said it best, John 21:18
Common English Bible (CEB)
18 I assure you that when you were younger you tied your own belt and walked around wherever you wanted. When you grow old, you will stretch out your hands and another will tie your belt and lead you where you don’t want to go.”

http://www.upworthy.com/a-gorgeous-woman-shakes-her-body-on-stage-and-the-crowd-goes-wild?c=reccon1

Stephen Vincent Palmer ~ The Man. The Myth and The Legend!!

On December 14, 2013December 2, 2014 By dancingpalmtreesIn Edward Palmer, Genetic lineage, Genetic Memory, Mable Elizabeth Palmer, Mable Palmer5 Comments

Stephen Vincent Palmer ~ QCP Christmas Party 2013

TESTIMONY & PRAISE REPORT TIME!! Just learning of Stephen’s photography talent testifies to the Glory and Greatness of God! Back in 1963 when my parents took Stephen to various doctors trying to find out my their son age 2 did not speak, these idiot stupid doctors told my parents that Stephen, then a two year old child would never amount to anything, could not be trained, could not learn and that they should give up and place him in an institution, which in those days would have been Willowbrook. I Thank God every day for my parents faith and persistence that their child could and would learn.

Those of us over 45 know and remember the horrors Geraldo Rivera discovered at that terrible place. Thank you Lord that my parents did not listen to the dumb doctors but took their son, my brother home to raise him as normal as possible. Today thanks to my parents, the caring staff people at QCP & AABR, my brother Stephen Vincent Palmer is a living testimony in what God can do in and with the lives of developmentally disabled/mentally challenged persons if they get the right help, support & encouragement. Also remember that a few months ago Gov. Andrew Cuomo wanted to cut the budget for developmentally disabled citizens of New York once again condemning them to the warehousing of 1960s & 1970s. Wake Up People!! Without kindness, compassion and professionalism of Ms. Lopez at QCP Stephen might have never discovered and cultivated this hidden gift for photography. Please don’t allow our government to short change our disabled American citizens!! A person is not a label or a disability. They are more than what or who society says there are. Stephen is living proof of that! I’m also very Thankful and give much gratitude to AABR Stephen’s training center for nearly 30 years which has equipped him with job skills that give him a place in the workplace and a sense of personal pride and accomplishment!

While at the QCP (164th Street in Queens) Holiday party I discovered that my brother Stephen is a budding photographer. Stephen has taken some outstanding photos. Ms. Mynra Lopez, the Artistic director for QCP is seeking gallery space to showcase the excellent photography skills of developmentally disabled adults at QCP. We’re looking for a Spring 2016 debut. Oh yes an interesting addendum to all this is that our Dad Edward G. Palmer was avid photographer so I suppose Stephen and I both possess the photography genes. Please email, private message or call me so we can make this happen for adults with autism and cerebral palsy. Thanks!

Memorial Day 2013

On May 27, 2013May 30, 2016 By dancingpalmtreesIn 29th Colored Regiment CT, Airforce, Army, Civil War, Edward Palmer, Korean War, Memorial Day, William Henry Halstead6 Comments

William H. Halstead name as inscribed on the Colored Soldiers Monument in Washington, DC

William Henry Halstead Headstone ~ Sleepy Hollow

In December of 1863 my Great Great Grandfather, William Henry Halstead, who

lived in Tarrytown, New York, traveled to New Haven, Connecticut to join the

29th Connecticut Colored Infantry. On his Volunteer Enlistment papers it notes

his occupation as a farmer. He enlisted for three years and was discharged on the

24th day of October 1865. He married and had five children. William Henry

Halstead passed away in 1888 and was buried in Sleepy Hollow Cemetery in

Tarrytown, New York. His wife moved to New York City with her five children.

Her children grew up in Harlem and belonged to various organizations such as Odd

Fellows, Ladies of the Grand Army of the Republic and the Daughters of New

York.

Special honor & glory to the Black soldiers, including my Great, great Grandfather William Henry Halstead, 29th Colored Regiment, CT, who served in the Civil War even though at first Lincoln was reluctant to allow Blacks to enlist, to the Navajo code talkers whose messages helped win WWII, to the Black veterans of WWII & Korea who fought for Double Victory, overseas and at home; to our brave Japanese American troops who fought bravely during WWII while they families were herded into internment camps; to our Vietnam Vets who were spat upon and called names when they returned to the USA; to all Women soldiers and Veterans who often have to fight the enemy without and within (sexual abuse); to all Lesbian and Gay soldiers who until recently had to where a mask or risk being expelled from the military. Many of us served, fought, were disabled and died because we loved our country even when our country did not love us in return. I Salute you All!

Spec. 4 Palmer — U.S. Army, 1977-1981

569th PSC & 101st Airborne Division