The last time that I was super Agile was back in my Army Days. I was extremely agile and in excellent physical condition. Anything that the Army demanded or need to do physically I could do it. Those were my glory days. Even after I got out of the Army in Nov. 1981 I was still in great shape. This continued well into my early 40s. I did have the beginnings of arthritis but except for menstrual cramps and sometimes acne I was in fantastic condition.
1978 Augsburg, Germany
Deborah Ann Palmer U.S. Army 1977-1981
During my late 30s and early 40s I had the strength and energy to earn my BA in English from Marymount Manhattan College. I Was Powerful!!
Marymount Manhattan College 2002 Graduation photo
Fast forward to Nov. 2008 — Stroke. Actually I probably was having small strokes beginning at age 47. My vision was off and but I still continued to drive and made believe that I was okay. At the time I was unemployed so No health insurance therefore No doctors. Jan. 2008 I started working at the museum and had a stroke while at work. My bosses forced me to go to the hospital. I lost most of the vision in my left eye. I won’t go into the ugly details.
This was the end of my Agility.
Either last week or two weeks ago I was nearly pushed down the subway steps. This is one of my greatest fears since I have very poor depth perception. Usually when I get off the train I wait for the maddening crowds to go up the stairs first. Actually this near fall down the subway steps occurred when I was going down the steps not up but either way I leave early for work then step to the side because people are always in a mad rush! Also now I have shortness of breath so I need to rest before going up or down stairs/steps.
Over the years I’ve come to hate all stairs and steps. My ideal dream would be to live in a place with just ramps or on one level. The Aging process is slowly but surely taking away my ability to do the things I want to do. Therefore the older I get the less I socialize and tend to stay home on weekends especially in the winter when falling is a major concern. Next month I’ll be 59 and I will be staying safe at home!
Foggy Misty morn over Central Park in the ball field
Cloud Mists ~ For Lucy
Mists Cloud your face yet never your smile, laughter, your cheerfulness, your precious spirit. Life moves on but there will always be an empty space where you once stood. You were a sweet and gentle soul. All the world is passing by and I want to shout, Stop! Wait a minute! Don’t you know a melody has ceased playing? A familiar song is now silent? Here I remain stoic yet crying inside wishing I could reach through this veil of tears and take your hand once again.
Misty Day
Remembrance
Though we be in the Autumn of our lives we still beam the Girlish Dreams of Youth. When the cord is cut mid-stream will our dreams be cast into the raging seas…..ashes scattered to the prevailing winds blanketing the Earth like so many strips of confetti after the parade has ended?
Are our dreams lost forever or merely transferred to future generations. When death stills earthly dreams do they take wings and fly towards the Heavens. Do our Ancestors dream of those yet to join them? Are we the living dreaming Lineages cut short who seek a bloodline vessel?
Girlish dreams beckon faded broken bodies. Minds kindled by the flames of youth —- yet the structure could not hold. BOOM!! And ever so slowly and softly one million photographs gently wafted to earth to be gathered by the Memory Gleaners and placed in the gallery of Lost Souls.
Do Heavenly dwellers have earthly memories? Can Memories transpose the veil? And we, if we be close enough or strong enough then death will hold no obstacle. Essence travels freely no longer bound by fleshly concerns.
Espiritu en Fuego/A Fiery Spirit 