The Fallacies of Youth

On August 21, 2016 By dancingpalmtreesIn Army, Combining Youth and Jeopardize, Menopause, The Daily Post, The Fallacies of Youth, U.S. Army, U.S. Army Veteran, Uncategorized, United States Army2 Comments

Combining Youth and Jeopardize.

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Fallacy

fal·la·cy

ˈfaləsē/

noun

plural noun: fallacies

a mistaken belief, especially one based on unsound argument.

“the notion that the camera never lies is a fallacy”

synonyms: misconception, misbelief, delusion, mistaken impression,error, misapprehension, misinterpretation, misconstruction,mistake; More
LOGIC

a failure in reasoning that renders an argument invalid.

faulty reasoning; misleading or unsound argument.

“the potential for fallacy which lies behind the notion of self-esteem”

Youth ~~ A time of Life when the world is your Oyster and you truly believe that like the Disney character Jiminy Cricket that if you wished upon a star all your dreams will come true.

I have to admit that joining the Army afforded me the opportunity to deviate from my strict upbringing and experience the wide world of sex, drugs and partying. I was not allowed to date until I was 17 and even then my Dad chaperoned my dates. So when I went into the military I had a kind of unchecked freedom in which to turn every No-No to a Yes-Yes. I had yet to realize the difference between friendship and Love. As they used to say back in the day I was Wild. Not to the point of having a child out of wedlock because that would have brought shame and disgrace to my family so I chose not to bring any kids into my free-wheeling lifestyle.

Also I knew that I did not want to get married. Ever. I made the decision when I was young to remain single. Being a Woman does not automatically make you a good candidate for marriage or motherhood. Being strong willed I’ve followed this Life of Singledom course with very few regrets. Occasionally I do wonder how my life would have turned out if I had gone the traditional route but after giving it some serious thought based on my personality for me to have pursued marriage or being a Mom would have been a disaster for all involved.

Now where does the word Jeopardize come in? Well often when you are young you jeopardize friendships with the opposite gender by introducing sex into the equation. After living in an abusive domestic violence relationship for seven years with my common-law husband I finally got physically free (he left me) in 2007. However it took years before I was mentally or emotionally free and to tell the truth I am not the same person that I was before I met him nor will I ever return to that open trusting young woman that was me.

I have dated a little (very little) in the last few years but I’ve learned that it’s best for me to remain friends with men and not engage in intimate behaviors. I’ve only deviated once to take a chance with a man whom I was friends with for several years and again disaster. Now we are no longer friends. Sex will ruin friendship every time.

I have one particular divorced male friend with whom I used to work with until he retired last year. We still talk on the phone about once a month and I emailed him when anything interesting happens at the job. Of course initially there was that sexual attraction but now that I’m in my 50s and he’s in his 60s we know better than to make mistakes which will destroy a great friendship. I really enjoying being able to talk with him because we have the same core values, we can discuss a wide variety of topics, he gives good advice and has a great perspective on Life.

Romance is something found in books, theater plays and movies. Real life is totally different. The Divorce rate in America is I believe 50% that includes Christians also. Therefore I’ve never seen any good reason to join myself to some man’s Life and exclude and deny my own goals, dreams and aspirations. As a Woman you always have to weigh what you gain in a relationship against what you will have to give up. Usually as the woman you put aside your wants, dreams, and desires to fulfill his. Having been through that many times I always sided with Me as opposed to him therefore I am not wife material.

I’m glad I’m no longer in my youth excepting my bodily aches and pains. In that case I wish I had my 27 year old pain free body back!! LOL!! This 57 year old body mocks me on a daily basis!

With aging has come not only knowledge but wisdom. The dumb, stupid, foolish mistakes of my youth are behind me. I don’t compete with other women young or old for the attentions of men. Of course I enjoy hearing and getting compliments from men. What woman doesn’t? (My next post will be on that subject.) But my perspectives have changed. Menopause has simmered down my hormones. The desire for sex decreases. With my hectic crazy work schedule if offered the choice between sex and sleep I’ll take sleep. By myself. Alone.

I can’t say what the future holds. Will I meet the man of my dreams and yes I still do dream but on the other hand I’m not looking for him because one of the graces of old age is to accept Life as it is and not to relive or try to revive a youth that no longer physically exists. Inside I still have the excitement I felt when I was 18 getting on my first plane ride to Ft. Jackson, SC for Basic Training and AIT. When I’m alone walking through New York City streets, Central Park or any Botanic Garden I still marvel and wonder at both creations of man and God but now instead of acting on impulse it’s a quiet awe, reverence and respect and quiet Thanks to my Creator for allowing me to make it thus far and prayers as I travel to my 60s and begin the next phase of my life.

SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2016 WEEK 13

On March 28, 2016 By dancingpalmtreesIn 101st Airborne Division, 569th PSC, Army, C130 Rolling Down The Strip - Military Running Cadence, Rock Steady Running Cadence, SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2016 WEEK 13, SYW8 Comments

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With your answers, please remember we are in the SYW world and which may not always match our reality.

Are you left or right handed?

Right Handed.

If you had only one TV, would you prefer the TV in the living room or another room?

I don’t have a TV in my current location. No room. I can’t afford a TV or the high cost of Cable Television. I did save my Mom’s small TV after she died but that is in storage. Now I’m used to not watching or having a TV so even if my housing situation improves I doubt I would purchase one.

Have you ever participated in a distance walking, swimming, running, or biking event? Tell your story.

Thanks to Uncle Sam who had me marching, walking and running long distances Yes. I served in the U.S. Army from 1977 – 1981 and believe me like that old TV commercial used to say soldiers do more before 9:00 am than most people do during an entire day. Good Old Papa Tango or PT!! CQ banging on your door with a metal stick at 5:00 am so you can make a 6:00 am formation. We ran in boots sometimes our Jump Boots. No fancy sneakers or running shoes. Usually the Sgt. is running alongside the formation calling Cadence. Most of these songs raunchy but you got used to it. They weren’t there to pamper your ears. Here are two of the cleaner Cadence songs from my Army Days.

I was in the 569th PSC, Augsburg, Germany and the 101st Airborne Division (Screaming Eagles)!!

While working at my former company I did participate in one of those Heart or Cancer walks. Can’t remember which one. Maybe once I retire if it is physically possible I might start doing some 5K walks. No running. Bad arthritic knees.

C130 Rolling Down The Strip – Military Running Cadence

Rock Steady Running Cadence

Deborah Ann Palmer U.S. Army 1977-1981 — Deborah Ann Palmer
U.S. Army 1977-1981

Complete this sentence: Love is… .

My brother Stephen Vincent Palmer

Bonus question: What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up?

My one week vacation for the first week in May got approved!! Hooray!! Now I will be able to be with and help Celebrate my brother Stephen’s 55th Birthday!! Yippee!! I am also Thankful for a wonderful Palm Sunday and yesterday Easter Sunday. Looking forward to the month of April and hopefully warmer weather for the New York City area.

The Road Less Traveled | The Daily Post

On February 21, 2016 By dancingpalmtreesIn 101st Airborne Division, 569th PSC, Army, The Road Less Traveled | The Daily Post, U.S. Army, Uncategorized, United States Army6 Comments

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THEDAILYPOST

Feb 21, 2016

DAILY PROMPT

The Road Less Traveled

Pinpoint a moment in your past where you had to make a big decision. Write about that other alternate life that could have unfolded.

Major Decision #1

November 1977 to November 1981 when I joined the United States Army. This gave me the opportunity to not only serve my country but travel to Europe and meet people from all over the United States. I did my Basic and AIT at Ft. Jackson, SC. I was posted at the 569th PSC in Augsburg, Germany and at the 101st Airborne Division located at Ft. Campbell, KY. During my four years in the Army I also went TDY (temporary duty) at various bases inside and outside the U.S.

The Army reinforced the sense of discipline, accountability and responsibility that my parents Edward and Mable Palmer had already implanted within me. I received an Honorable Discharge and am very proud to be a U.S. Army Veteran.

1978 Augsburg, Germany

Deborah Ann Palmer U.S. Army 1977-1981

Major Decision #2

September 1995 when I decided to move forward in earning my BA at Marymount Manhattan College. My Dad Edward G. Palmer had just passed away that year May 13, 1995 at age 65 and I then became responsible for both my mother Mable Palmer and my brother Stephen Palmer. I felt I needed to get my BA as being a College graduate was both my Dad’s desire and mine but I was just too busy running around living free and easy. Once my Father died I inherited his responsibilities and I felt that college would give me an up in terms of critical thinking and advancing my then career.

Being a student was both exhilarating and challenging. At that time Marymount Manhattan College was a private Women’s Catholic college which had just begun to admit men on a limited scale. Therefore the classes were small and the professors took a personal interest in the intellectual and educational development of each student. By the time I went to MMC all the instructors were secular not the Nuns that had preceded them many years before. The professors and the Dean were dedicated to helping Ladies succeeded especially returning Women students like myself.

At that time I was 36 years old definitely not a teenager but an adult who worked full-time and a caregiver. I did briefly attend Marymount Manhattan College around 1987/88 but being in my 20s was my wild & crazy period so I did not stick it out even though I was doing very well in school. Not to say the professors were easy on the students in terms of work load. There were tons of novels and other books to read and 25 page research papers to write on a bi-weekly basis. I suppose it was stressful but a positive stress. An intellectual challenge and I rose to the occasion.

Entering college as an adult I knew that I wanted to major in English literature unlike an 18 year old who is inexperienced with the world in general and probably has very little work experience. At age 36 I had already served my country as a soldier in the United States Army and had many years in the workplace. Many people including some relatives kept asking me “Why are you majoring in English? Are you going to become a teacher?” My answer then as now is I Love English literature and I knew I could pass and no I had no intentions of becoming a teacher.

My Mom who was still living at the time never asked me any ridiculous questions. She was happy that I cared for her, went to work, studied hard in school and went to church. Mom was proud of me and my accomplishments. Sadly my mother followed my Dad into the hereafter August 1998 at age 68. Neither she nor my Dad ever got to see me graduate from Marymount Manhattan College May 2002 when I was 43 however their spirits spurred me on to successfully complete a difficult year long course called Women in Urban Leadership, make the Deans List in 1999 and graduate Cum Laude. Both my parents were born in 1930 at a time when racism, lynchings, discrimination and Jim Crow ruled America. They felt that my generation as the first generation to benefit from the Civil Rights Movement could and should uplift the race through education. My accomplishments were not just for me but for my parents, grandparents, aunts and great-uncles who never had those opportunities.

Marymount Manhattan College opened up a new world to me, helped develop my writing skills and gave me confidence in those writing skills. During this time the then Dean Joan Brookshire said to me that I had a gift for writing. My professors male and female built me up and I felt a sense of accomplishment. So for me returning to college was probably the best decision of my adult life.